The Surprise In Life (Originally You're Giving Me Such A Rush)

Chapter 14

That’s when it hit me though I needed to move on and start doing stuff for myself. I needed to stop obsessing over Jack, Aimee, and even where I stand with Alex. I threw on some black denim shorts and a simple white t shirt as I got ready to head to the beach with Zack. I blared Maybe Tonight by the Summer Set as I walked out. That song helped me feel better and realize that I needed to worry about myself more and stop worrying what everyone else thought but more about myself. I need to stop worrying and live my life for what it is.

When Zack and I got to the beach he turned to me “So I have a question?”

I nodded “Okay what is it?”

“Where did you get that necklace?”

I blushed slightly looking down at the emerald necklace that laid against my shirt. “It’s kinda embarrassing but I had a one night stand and the guy left it behind...”

Zack laughed “Seriously?”

I nodded “I thought it was pretty so I took it.”

“You crack me up...”

I shrugged laughing “I know I’m skilled.”

I walked into the club with Cassadee laughing.

She turned to me “The guys go on in a minute.”

I ordered us drinks “Okay we can head over there in a second.”

She nodded. Their show tonight was in a local club in Atlantic City, NJ. I was ready to drink and have a good time. Tonight they had special guests Millionaires performing. I have actually known those girls for years. We’ve been friends since high school and the fact that they’re performing I got really excited about. They started performing ‘Drinks On Me.’

I turned to Cassadee “I’m gonna forget everything tonight and let loose. I’m gonna get wasted I don’t care.”

She chuckled “Good! You need a good time!”

We had fun drinking and dancing to the music. After the show we went back stage.

I met up with Melissa and Allison. They were excited to see me. We winded up partying together.

Matt walked over to me “Ava? What are you doing?”

I giggled “Having a good time! I wanna have a good time for once! Don’t be a party pooper!”

He grew very serious “What about Jack?”

I got angry “Fuck Jack! He doesn’t give a shit about me! I’m tired of everyone lying to me! He only cares about Aimee! I’m nothing to him! So excuse me for moving on and having a good time!”

Matt sighed “You have no idea Ava...”

I waved him off “Whatever Matt. I’m not letting Jack run my life anymore. I’ve been holding out for him but clearly that’s getting me nowhere!”

He threw his arms up “Whatever Ava. I can’t even deal with you right now. Find me when your sober.”

I watched him walk away and to tell you the truth at that moment I didn’t care. I didn’t care about anything. I just wanted to feel numb and forget everything.

Allison turned to me “Well that put a downer on things...”

I waved her off “No I’m not letting him ruin our good time!”

Melissa sighed “Av, he’s worried about you...”

I looked down “I know... I’m tired of everyone worrying about me. There’s nothing wrong with me...”

Allison challenged that “Oh really? Whose Jack then?”

I tried to play it off “Just a guy.”

Melissa raised her eyebrow “Just a guy?”

Allison shook her head “Liar...”

I sighed “Fine he’s the guy I’m in love with. I’ve been in love with him for a while. But he is with someone else. He doesn’t care about me.”

Melissa turned to me “How do you know he doesn’t care?”

Allison added “Has he ever told you that he doesn’t care?”

I broke down “No... I just know.”

Allison sat next to me “No you don’t. You’re afraid he does care. You want to move on and the fear of him caring about you but having also having a girlfriend scares you.”

I wiped tears that were rolling down my face “We kissed numerous times. I care too much about him and he loves someone else! It kills me watching her with him and I am just a secret hook-up for when he’s drunk and won’t remember.”

Melissa sat on my other side “I’m sure he’s confused. He would love you if he knew he had the chance!”

I cried louder “I don’t want to give him the chance.”

Allison rubbed my back “Aw sweetie... You love him don’t you?”

I sniffled “More than anything...”