Poisoned Minds

6. Good Luck

A/N: tsym for 108 reads already!! Ily all!! :D

I've been at Aunty Liz's house for a week now. I've recieved condolences from just about every single person I know - and from some I don't - making me feel as though I'm drowning in a sea of sympathy.

I hate it.

Does no one understand that all I really want is to be left alone?

I haven't really been crying much - which has surprised me, but then I never was the crying type - just sitting around and letting myself fall deeper into the gaping pit of grief.

Right now, I'm sitting on my bed, listening to sad music. I can't bear the happy stuff.

Aunty Liz said that when people are upset about something they tend to wallow in it, which is definitely what I'm doing right now. I feel like it's the wrong thing to do and I should be trying anything I can to lift my spirits, but right now, I don't feel as though I have any spirit to lift.

Kira texted me last night and asked me if I wanted her to come over, but I politely refused. I don't want to have to see anyone unless it's completely necessary.

I sit there in silence for about five minutes before I hear the door go.

Go away, I think. I don't want any more sympathy.

I hear Aunty Liz open the door, and I hear her talking.

"Thalia! It's for you," she shouts up the stairs.

Tell them to go away, I think. But instead of saying that, I get up and slowly make my way down the stairs.

When I get down to the hallway, I see who my visitor is.

It's Alex, the boy who was in the school medical room that day. I'm surprised to see him, to say the least.

He bites his lip as though not sure what to say. I raise my eyebrows, not knowing what to say either.

Aunty Liz gives me a look - she probably thinks there's something going on between us - and then says, "shall I leave you to it?"

I give her a hard stare but she just smiles and goes into the kitchen.

"So, um, what are you...doing here?" I say. I don't want to appear rude, but at the same time I just want to get whatever this is over with.

"Uh..." Alex looks like he's forgotten why he's actually here. I just stand there, probably looking bored.

"Okay, this is going to sound really weird... Oh god." He chews on one of his fingernails.

"Just say it, whatever it is. I'm sure I've heard stranger stuff," I say. After what's happened recently, I'm pretty sure he's not going to sound that weird.

"Okay," he takes a deep breath, "have you, by any chance, been having... Like, hallucinations recently?" That last part seemed to take a lot of effort to say. He looks at me as if he's praying that I won't think he's crazy.

I'm speechless for a few seconds. I stare at him like an idiot for a few seconds, my mouth probably hanging open. Once I've recovered myself, I start to speak.

"How... How did you know?" I say.

Alex looks completely relieved. He lets out a little laugh.

"Oh my god, I thought you were going to think I was mad," he says, running a hand through his hair nervously.

"Well, to be honest I'm feeling exactly the opposite - I thought I was going crazy," I say. I'm suddenly overwhelmed with happiness that someone else is going through this too - or at least knows what I'm going through. I feel an urge to hug him, although that would be kind of inappropriate since we've probably spoken twice at maximum and shared a few brief glances at school.

Instead of doing that, I just smile. He gives a relieved smile back.

"So, how did you know?" I repeat the question, as he seems to have forgotten that I asked him.

"I... I don't know," he says, looking confused. "I guess... when I saw you in the medical room, I somehow just knew that you'd had it too. The hallucination."

I feel a surge of happiness again before I realise what that could mean.

But then I think of something - something that makes the happiness disappear as soon as it has come.

"Wait, so, did you see a member of your family get..." I trail off. He knows what I was going to say. A dark look comes over his face and he nods slowly.

"So..."

"Oh, no, no... I...got there...in time," he says quietly. I feel relieved, but sad at the same time, that he got lucky. And I didn't.

I never get lucky.