Kian pov
The next few weeks seemed to go by unbelievably fast... I fell into a daily routine where I would wake up, go to school, stay for practice and then head over to Jc's house to 'study'.
He was an amazing teacher, seeming to understand exactly how to word a problem so it would make sense in my mind. It didn't seem to bother him that I became frustrated easily... if anything it only made him try harder. Our combined effort showed and even over just a short period of time I had bumped up by one letter grade in each of my classes.
The more time we spent together the more my feelings grew and I knew I wouldn't be able to hide them much longer... I was the type off person who needed to express my feelings not suppress them. If you were bothering me, I told you. If you crossed a line, I'd push you back. if I had fallen helplessly in love with you simply because of your brown eyes, luscious curls, amazing personality and kind heart... then I needed to shout it across the rooftops, whisper it in your ear and sing it to you softly until you understood.
Hiding how I felt made me feel like I was hiding from myself... and I had done that long enough. so as I walked to school the Friday before Christmas break I battled with my feelings.
Why if he likes you back?
what if hates you after you tell him?
what if he doesn't even like guys?
what if he's already in a relationship with someone from his old town?
What if, what if, what if....
every possible scenario running threw my head as I walked into the building, letting my feet take me wherever they wanted... and of course they brought me to his locker...
"kian?... kian?!" his voice snapped me out of my thoughts and jolted me back to the suffocating world of reality. I blinked a few times then focused on the boy in front of me.
he was wearing dark wash jeans and a red shirt that said 'nice' on the front and 'naughty' on the back. His wild curls were falling in his eyes, even though he had just tried to move them out of the way. His adorably chubby cheeks were coated in the light blush they always seemed to have when I was around and his eyes were focused on the notebook in front of him. truly he was the most beautiful human I had ever laid eyes on and my heart ached knowing hasn't mine.
"well?" he looked up at me expectantly and I shook myself out of my thoughts...
"sorry what did you say... got a bit distracted" I mumbled. he rolled his eyes and laughed a bit.
"I ask you what your plans were for Christmas..." he beamed at me but all I managed was a week smile in return.
The last few years I've all together hated Christmas... as I said before holidays had become very uneventful and lonely times for me. This year my mom was had insisted on working Christmas eve no matter how many times I broached the topic of her taking off, or even coming home early. All of my friends were going to be away, seeing there family, laughing and enjoying there time off; while I on the other hand was going to spend the holiday home, alone, trying and failing to make cookies, then watching Christmas movies until I fell asleep.
"I'm just going to be home... probably catch some holiday movie marathons. hang out with hazey... nothing special" I tried not to let my sadness show but I apparently I did a horrible job at it because he gave me a pitiful look.
"what about your mom? Is she going to be home?" he touched my shoulder gently but his tone was stern.
For some reason when it came to me being alone he got very protective... It was nice to know he cared but sometimes I just wished he would drop the topic. I didn't need to be reminded that I was a pathetic loner.
YOU ARE READING
We'll See (a jian fanfic)
Fanfiction*ON HOLD* Kian Lawley is a Senior football player at L.A.'s Brooke stone high he has dyslexia and anxiety that makes class hard for him. In fact school is so hard for him the only class he's really passing is his filming elective. And with a less th...
