Torn (My Story of Possibility Entering Depression)

11/11/15

Me and Lizzy had amazing fun spinning around and getting dizzy. After the 4th time, we took a break and ran into the net area. A bright, orange ball was laying in the fake grass field, so we ran and gabbed it. Then a sudden scream startled us. "Give that back!" Landon shouted. We looked at each other and ran over to the basketball court, and his behind a few walls, with the ball. I looked behind me and saw Landon and Logan. I told Lizzy they were coming. We ran until Logan caught up.(We didn't run very far.) Lizzy told me to give him the ball. I was glad Landon wandered off. I threw the ball and went torward the net again, when Landon grabbed me from behind my back. He grabbed my hands and kept them there until I shouted for him to let me go. Later on, we were running again. "Fear has two meanings." I told Lizzy. "Forge everything and run, or face everything and rise." I chose number 2. We walked up to him, and I managed to snag a ball away from him. Taking his ball was like him taking away my happiness and freedom. We ran around. He grabbed my Frisbee and I was furious. I ran as fast as I could and grabbed the other Frisbee in the net. It only got worse. Everyone threw a ball at my head, causing me to cry. After PE, I was putting my shoe on when Logan threw my other one. I was furious. I stopped over to grab it and ran back, my shoe in the air, ready to hit him. I didn't though. After that, I pushed Morgan, someone teasing me. I then pushed Logan, the main bully. I couldn't help myself, my anger has seemed to activate and wouldn't turn off. I wanted to yell at him for all the pain he caused me, but instead, I kept quite. I've never hated some one so much in my life. I don't want to fight, even if it means being respected. I don't care if I get in trouble for standing up for myself, I'm not their puppet anymore. I'm not going to be their Lapis, I'm not going to be Jasper in Malachite. I'm DONE! I was so raged, yet so upset. I didn't know how to feel then. I was so angry I felt like fire, but I was so upset like rain.