Dark Chocolate Cherry

VENERATION

Amy is late to Calculus, but this doesn't seem to stop her from taping a note to the back of my jacket as I leave class. I don't even bother to read it, I just throw it in the garbage on my way to lunch.

I don't feel like eating, so I just sit down where Nolan and I usually do. He comes over a while later with some type of sandwich wrapped in tinfoil.

"So," he sighs. "Have you changed your mind about our little escapade yet?"

"I don't know." I drum my fingernails on the table absentmindedly. "God, I didn't know it was that bad. Why didn't anyone try to help that poor freshman?"

"Junior."

"Whatever."

Nolan unwraps his sandwich thing and takes a bite, chewing thoughtfully. "They're afraid the focus will shift. Everyone around here is so afraid of becoming the victim that they don't try to help the people who actually are."

"That's selfish."

Nolan raises his eyebrows. "Is it?" He takes another bite of his sandwich. "Or is it smart? There's a very fine line between selfish and smart when it comes to the Red Angel Dragnets, Inge."

"And we're balancing on it."

"Yes," Nolan agrees, the corner of his mouth twitching a little bit. "But you're leaning over towards the selfish side."

Barely listening to him, I glance over towards the middle of the room, where Olive is seated with her friends. They're talking and laughing as if it's the greatest moment of their lives, and it occurs to me that Olive doesn't know that her parents are breaking up.

"Inge."

I turn back to Nolan. "What does Olive think of all this?"

"Uh," Nolan's eyes wander around. "All of what?"

"All of the..." I try to search for a better word, but can't find one. "...bullying."

Nolan looks down, chewing slower, and doesn't respond.

"Nolan?" I almost scold. "Have you even told her?"

"Of course I've told her!" he says finally, and I raise my eyebrows. "Well, not in a super, uh, concrete...way."

"So, you haven't told her about the harassment and you haven't told her about the divorce—are there any other secrets you're keeping from her?"

"Um..." He pauses. "When Dad ran over our dog Gustave I told her he ran away."

My eyes widen. "Nolan! How could you?"

"I didn't think she was ready to cope with death! We were seven. Can you imagine how upset I was? I didn't want her to have to go through that—"

"Nolan, that's life. You can't shelter her from it; she isn't a little kid. She's seventeen years old and one year away from being a legal adult, and you need to tell her all the horrid secrets you've been keeping from her unless you want to lose her trust."

"I don't care if I lose her trust, I just want to keep her safe!"

"She isn't yours to keep safe, Nolan. That's your parents' job!"

"Yeah, well, they quit a long time ago."

I suddenly realize that I've raised my voice too loud than I would like. Today has been an eruption of Mount Hate, and I'm sitting near the top, practically vaporized in magma. I wish I could just go home, blare some PVRIS, and sit alone in my room until tomorrow.

"I'm sorry," I say quietly. "I shouldn't have pried."

Nolan shakes his head. "Don't."

I fold my hands together and try to think of something to talk about. "They're holding auditions for the Taming of the Shrew."