My Heart Wonders What Is Love||《Maze Runner (Thomas) fanfiction》

Chapter 12 - There's a hole where my heart should be

I knew where the eating area was so I went over there myself and grabbed my food.

Finally getting to eat a real meal properly!

I decide to sit with Chuck at his table.

"Hey do you mind if I sit?"

"Sure," he says and scoots over a little.
"So how's the glade treating you?"

"Horrible." I say. "I'm no good at any of these jobs. Maybe If I could try being a runner I'd actually be good and help everyone escape this hell hole! "

I didn't mean for it to come out harshly but Chuck looked hurt.

"I'm sorry." I whisper.

He doesn't say anything at first.

"It's ok I remember feeling trapped at first but you get used to it and being a runner isn't going to be of any good." He sighs

"That's just the point. I fail to see how you you could spend your life in a perpetual state of oblivion and actually imagine yourself growing old here."

"It's not fair!"

I exhale.

"The aura of sophistication is too much for us guys dearest Margo." Thomas says and bites into the apple he is currently holding in his right hand.

"Well that's a pity to my being." I smile and finish my lunch. "Thanks for sticking up for me." I say quietly now as I've done enough shouting at one sitting.

"What do you mean?." They both ask and Thomas makes another indenture into his apple.

"Oh I was kind of listening in on the meeting this morning." 
I smirk at him and he and Chuck give me a look.

"Well then I fully agree with Gally that you are an evil spy and I am not, oh the irony" Thomas winks at me and finishes of his apple.

"You know what Margo your right. It's not fair that I finally get a new friend and she could be so selfish to try and take that away from me! When Thomas is away I'm all alone but I thought that would end when I met you. I guess I was wrong!" Chuck yells at me before finally whispering in a calmer tone. "Have you ever thought about what your up against how many people have to get hurt for you to be happy?" And with that he carries his tray back to Fry pan. And leaves.

"I have to go" I barely croak out and also take my tray back to the pile leaving Thomas alone.

"Please wait." I hear Thomas say not shouting but asking.

He grabs my hands and looks me in the eyes. I feel like this has happened befriending as I recall the events if last night but right now I just want to be alone and feel sorry for myself because as far as my emotional range expands that's what people do when they're sad and you can't deny it.

"Meet me at the Deadheads at midnight."

***

I sat alone among the tall grass and stared up at the fake sky. According to the gladers it never rained or anyhing else but the blue sky that I am faced with now.
Not a single flaw or imperfection. No clouds. It was perfect, almost too perfect to be real which is why it wasn't.

I hurt him real bad but I can't help feeling sorry for me and nobody else. Suprisngly no one came to ask me why I'm sitting among the grass not that I thought it was rude of them but word of the incident probably spread.

Night was approaching and I didn't feel hungry and I think I fell asleep because I woke up with blades of grass tickling my nose.

Remembering Thomas's request I made my way quietly towards the eery Deadheads.

"Hey I heard your footsteps come on up." He says and grabs my hand.

"Am I a horrible person for my selfish needs? The glade didn't need this. Who was I kidding He's been here 2 months, I've been here 2 days and look where that's got me." I start to cry. I've never cried before so the experience is new.

"Margo I've never seen a girl before but I know that your way better than the many many girls outside the maze." He pulls me in for a hug and we sit down on the edge together.

"One too many manys my friend." I say and smile at him.

"So why am I here and not enjoying the comforts of sleeping?"

"Oh trust me you had enough sleep." He smirks and I give him a puzzled look.
"I kinda watched you sleep in the grass for a bit. Ok a long while."

"Because that's not creepy at all." I say sarcastically.

"Anyways I have a proposition," he starts.

"Proceed."

"Well the moral dilemma is we're stuck but I think you figured that out in the first 30 seconds you were brought here."

"It was rather obvious."

"Not for 95% percent of the glade. Off topic. I want to propose that tomorrow you come on a run with me and check out the view from the other side."

"Sounds like a plan."

"Great then, well go enjoy your sleep and be up extra early oh and try not to be seen."

"Thomas you are, Amazing."

"So that's what it feels like then?"

"What?"

"The feeling one gets for another when they have a deep affection for that person."

"You mean love?"

"How would you know what it is?"

"I guess some memories even the creators can't erase."

"I didn't know what love felt like until know." He sighs and I look at him for the first time. His eyes are sad but he has a smile on his face.

"Well maybe I can show you."
I don't know what I am doing but I leaned in and kissed him softly. It wasn't a true representation of what love is but it was enough. And it mattered to him.

"Why would anyone erase such bliss?"

"Love brings joy and joy can be shared and when joy is shared many people are all happy together ad happiness brings about hope." I stop and grit my teeth.

"Unfortunately all the hope has been stolen from us and I intend to get it back. If we were all miserable with no hope of getting out then the creators have already won and we rather just die a piece of this twisted puzzle not knowing where we fit in."

"But now I have love and you but that's kind of the same thing." He says and kisses my forehead gently.