His body feels like dry ice against mine as he holds me tight from behind. I'm smiling like a retard and I know it but I can't help it. I love it when he gives me those unforgettable backwards hugs, they take my breath away. He makes me feel like I am the only one that matters in the entire world. We have been together for three months and twenty six days and each and everyday has been heaven. I know it sounds a bit cliché. My world stops and starts with that boy.
I know it won't last forever and I know my heart will get broken but that's relationships for you. He says he's in love with me and understands why I won't say it back. He's good about things like that. I know it sounds terrible, the fact that I won't say I love him yet and we have almost been together for four months. But is four months really long enough to know if you love someone? I'm not one of those people to say things I don't mean and I'm not exactly all the way comfortable with him yet.
He tries to get me to talk about that night out at the lake when I was fourteen in my grandfathers cabin that I inherited three years ago, but he's great full that he gets a little bit of an explanation on what happened that warm summer night. I understand why he wants to know more but I know he also understands why I don't want to talk about it. No one knows the full story of what happened except for me and...never mind. The only thing that matters is I got out of there alive. It screwed me up for life and people say I need to talk about it to some one, but I dont want to, I don't want anyone to know what happened. I wish I didnt remember what happened but I remember every second of it. Every breath I took, how scared I was, how long it went on for, how many trees were around me, how many sticks I was laying on, everything in perfect detail.
Authors note please dont steal my story, it took a long time to write, thanks!
