Just off the Key of Reason

Chapter 7: We Need Umbrellas on the Inside

Camila was just getting ready for her show the next day when her phone buzzed. She smiled when Lauren's name popped up.

L: CAMILA!

C: LAUREN!

L: ARE YOU BUSY RIGHT THIS SECOND?

C: WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME?

L: THERE'S A BIRD IN OUR APARTMENT!

C: OH MY GOD LAUREN, GET RID OF IT! D:

L: I CAN'T CATCH IT, I DON'T LIKE BIRDS...

C: OKAY, stay in a different room or something Lolo, and don't let B eat it! I'm about to go on.

L: :( GOOD LUCK. HURRY.

C: aww :D I'LL BE HOME SOON

Camila didn't know what to expect as she trudged up the stairs in the apartment building. What if it was a fucking vulture? There could be a vulture in her apartment. Bald eagle. Chicken. Toucan. Goddamned emu. Lauren had not been specific enough. She squinted when she caught sight of two figures sitting in the hallway as she came out of the stairs. Lauren and Barnaby.

"Lauren! How long have you been out here?"

Lauren scrambled up and looked sheepish. "A few hours." She mumbled. "The bird was making me really nervous."

Camila looked at the door apprehensively. "So, what kind of bird is it? Because I was picturing geese and seagulls and..." God, what was the plural of albatross? Albatri?

Lauren just stared at her and Camila shook her head to clear her thoughts. Not the time for that, Camila. Focus. She set her shoulders and put her hand on the knob. "You coming?"

Lauren swallowed and nodded slightly, one hand clinging tightly to the back of Camila's coat, the other gripping Barnaby's leash. Camila couldn't blame her; Barnaby would most likely want to catch and 'play with,' or 'accidentally kill' any live thing that might be in their apartment.

Camila opened the door, stepped inside, and was dive-bombed by a pigeon. She shrieked and rushed through the apartment to the main bathroom, dragging Lauren and the dog along behind her. Lauren was holding her nose and blowing air out her ears as they locked the door behind them. "Camzi! That was-that was like sonar. Like-like a bat. I think you damaged my ears."

Camila tried to calm her racing heart. Barnaby looked overjoyed at all this damn excitement. "I'm sorry." Camila breathed out. She was much more focused on the wild fucking animal in her apartment than Lauren's temporary hearing loss. Crap. Crap. Crap. What to do. Camila whipped out her phone to call Harry, who didn't answer, of course. She sighed and dialed Dinah, yeah, oh God, as Lauren watched.

"Cabello, you ask her out yet?"

"Shut up Dinah!" Camila hissed, glancing at Lauren, who was rubbing absentmindedly at her ears. Barnaby had gotten in the bathtub.

"Geez, what's up your ass?"

"There's a feral pigeon flying around our apartment."

There was silence for a moment, then Dinah burst out laughing.

"Leave a window open?" Dinah choked out.

Camila looked pointedly at Lauren. "Obviously someone must have left a window open." Lauren flushed and stopped messing with her ears. "Come catch it for us."

Dinah stopped laughing. "What am I, some avian expert to you? I'm not a freaking bird-catching zookeeper Cabello. Do it yourself."

Camila sighed. "Dinah-"