Talk To Me Now I'm Older

Terrapin

"Hey. I didn't change so I hope we're not going anywhere fancy." I said, greeting Julian as I walked out my apartment. Fab was sound asleep, taking a nap in my room. I made him watch Gone With the Wind with me so he would fall asleep. I didn't tell him about the date. Quite frankly, I didn't want anyone to know about it.

He whinced. "I wanted to take you to this, like five star top notch restaurant that hipsters like", he joked. I laughed, walking down the street with him.

"I didn't tell Fab about this, I hope you don't mind."
"I didn't tell Albert." He smiled.
"So...is this a thing we're just going to keep a secret? Just for a little?" I asked cautiously.
"O-only if you want it to", he stuttered. I nodded my head, saying I wanted to keep it off the radar.

We turned a corner to a restaurant with Perivian food. It was fairly empty, but we both always went for the table in the corner. We each ordered a beer.

"What's yucca", he said in a very American accent. I snorted.
"It's yucca, sounds like it's spelled y-o-o-c-c-a."
"Oh sorry, I'm white as fuck." He smiled down at his menu.

The waiter came back, asking if he could take our order.

"Can we have another minute?" I asked.
"Of course", he smiled warmly. Julian shifted his eyes from behind the menu, inspecting the waiter.
"But in the meantime, can we get an order of yucca", I added.
"Sure thing." He said, giving me a side smile like it was more than just a friendly gesture.

Julian's eyes followed him all the way to the kitchen. I snickered behind my menu, using it to hide my face.

"Fuck that guy", he muttered under his breath. I laughed even harder, trying my best to be quiet about it. Julian looked at me, cracking a smile and finally letting my laughter get to him.
"That is so cute", I managed to say as my laughter died down.
"What's cute." He cocked his eyebrow.
"The way you got jealous. It's cute." I giggled softly.

He sipped his beer trying to act casual about it. I rolled my eyes, looking over at the waiter who was already eyeing me. I messed with him, smirking in his direction.

Julian looked at me, true jealously filling his eye. Then he let out a breathy laugh, sitting back in his chair. "I fucking hate you", he said playfully.

I looked back at Julian and winked.

We got our appetiser and a different waiter came to take out orders.

"So, try it." I motioned to the basket of fried yucca in front of us. He looked at me, pursing his lips and taking one. He dipped it into this sort of cheesy sauce that was amazing. He bit into it.

"It's like a french fry but...it's not", he said while stuffing the rest of it in his mouth.
"It's good, right?" I waited for his response.
"It's fucking great." His lips formed into a smile. I smiled back, taking one for myself.

• • •

"Dude, it's like he didn't even notice your existence", I laughed, reminding Julian of the waiter who was hitting on me all night as we walked back home. He laughed bitterly, kicking a rock.
"I know, what a douche. I'm just as attractive as you are, why didn't he give me the same attention?" He frowned, then giggled.
"Jules, you're beautiful. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise." I poked his chest with every word I spoke. He laughed through his noise, slinging his arm around my shoulders.

I smiled to myself, putting my arm around cutely awkward waist. I'm going to be okay...

"Remember that time in high school when James Henderson got his clothes stolen in gym so he had to walked around in his underwear to inform the front office?" Julian reminisced.
"Yeah, Nick and Fab did it. That was funny then, but it seems fucked up now. James was a really nice for a popular kid. I don't know why you guys picked on him because he was always nice." I said somewhat annoyed. "He asked me out, I never told you", I whispered.
"Seriously?" He had a surprised expression.
"Yeah man. I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to kick his ass." Truth was that he was so sweet, I almost considered it. Of course I'd never tell Jules that.

"Probably a good idea. Penny Cox asked me out", he trailed off.
"That bitch", I exclaimed louder than expected. "Sorry", I mumbled, putting my hand over my mouth. "I fucking hated her. She always thought she was better than everyone, with her unique hair and extraordinary clothes. It's like you see her and think, 'She seems cool, I wanna be friends with her.' And then you meet her and it's like 'What did I get myself into?'" I rolled my eyes.

Julian chuckled. "I never told you because I knew you hated her."
"Who didn't", I spat back. "Sorry, that was mean."
"It's okay, I would have kicked James' head in if you told me."
"Same goes for Penny", I smiled.

"High school was weird", he said, taking two cigarettes out and lighting them, handing one to me. I sucked in the smoke.
"It was", I said as I pushed the smoke out.

I remember Julian cheated on me in high school with a girl named Zara and did it because she was a massive prude. Julian just did it to get my attention because Zara was the only female acquaintance I had. Thinking back at that now, it was pretty fucked up. I mean, it was fucked up then but I was young and naive and easy to forgive him. He only kissed her, but I remember ignoring Julian for two weeks and only speaking to him to break it off. I never talked to Zara until graduation. She apologised, telling me that she never intended for our friendship to go down that route. I knew she meant well, so I forgave her. I went back with Julian three weeks after he kissed her. I'm not sure why, but I suppose I couldn't go on without him.

When Julian dropped out, we broke up. I ended high school in a shitty way, but I still got drunk with the guys on grad night, even if Julian was there. Fab and Nick were younger, so they had a couple years left. I can't remember, but I think Julian and I made out that night. I do remember distinctly not having sex because I was on my period and having a detailed conversation with the guys on how it would be to have sex with a girl while on their rag. All I have to say about that was that it was disgusting. I also slightly remember making out with Nikolai. He was a great kisser, what can I say?

"You thinkin' there", Julian asked, puffing out smoke.
"Not really", I lied. I could feel him glance at, but ignored asking me what was wrong.

My apartment complex came into view. We stopped in front of the door led to stairs.

I stepped on my cigarette, letting out a deep breath.

"I really had a nice evening." Julian smiled.
"I did too." For some reason, everything felt forced and fake now. Possibly from the remembrance of high school that made me soppy. I think he figured something was wrong, for I was definitely showing it in my facial expressions.

He looked at me nervously, leaning in. He looked into my eyes and then kissed me. I loved the way he kissed me. He would linger, making me ask for more, and that's when he would add in tongue.

I pulled away, heaving lightly from the loss of breath. I ran my thumb against Julian's plump lips. "Got some lipstick on you", I whispered.

He softly bit my thumb as I ran it along. He cradled my hand, sucking seductively on my thumb and then kissing my palm.

"I want to make one thing clear." I spoke strongly, making Julian stop and just stand there holding my hand.
"Okay", he whispered.
"If we're going to try this, we can't have any sex. We're going to treat this like a normal relationship."

He bit his lip. "Yeah, that makes sense", he sighed. Then he gave me one last kiss. "Good night", he said and walked down a couple of blocks before disappearing into a taxi.

I walked into the corridor and ran upstairs, sneaking back into my apartment and tiptoeing into my room. Luckily, Fab was now in his room and out cold, so I went in unnoticed.

After getting ready for bed, I thought about the relationship that was slowly forming between Julian and I. I didn't think the first date would have gone that well. I'm almost waiting for some twist to happen, but this is real life. It's hard for me to believe I can be this happy while being with him.

AN: Waaaaaay too lazy to check for any mistakes. Im finally on Spring break so I'll have more time to write <3