|| THE SUBURBS || ZACK MORRIS

prologue

It was in that moment when I belonged truly and completely to Zack Morris.

I couldn't sleep. The screaming fest between my brother and my dad echoed through the house despite being about two in the morning.

I couldn't be alone. Not again. Not tonight.

As I looked at the window, I thought about the boy I loved. How Zack was always there for me but deep down, I feared one day he wouldn't be. How he would leave me and the hell that was my existence. How he would find someone better. How he would leave Bayside without me.

But he was here now.

I threw several rocks at Zack's window knowing he was there and that he would wake up.

A few moments later he opened his window sleepily and looked at me with those blue eyes that could always read me like a book.

He always knew when I needed him.

He climbed over and sluggishly crawled into my small room. The dark room cluttered with books, clothes, and cassettes bought with the money I earned from summer babysitting and from my hard working brother.

And, "Come here",  was all Zack could say as he settled into my bed and waited for me.

As I climbed in with him and held onto his worn out nirvana shirt, listening to his slow, steady heartbeat, I forgot.

I forgot for a few moments.

I forgot about my drunken father, my brother who worked himself to the bone for us despite only being 17, and the lonely girl who ached for something other than bayside, california.

The only things in the world right here and now were the young, exhausted, and reckless teenagers laying on a twin mattress in a small dirty room thinking of each other.

"You know, tommorow's our first day back?", I told him after the fighting ceased into the night.

"Yeah. Screech wouldn't shut up about it yesterday. He mentioned bringing his ant farm into homeroom. God, I think he'll actually do it, too. " Burying my face into my neck, I replied, "Gotta love Screech. "

To which, he then pulled me closer and tilted his head ups lightly so we would be face to face.

"What I meant was, are you ready?", he could always see through me and my white lies. "No, not really", I admitted.

"But I'm tired of being scared. Scared of my father, scared of school, and scared of me. I refuse to be fucking scared.", I looked at him again, but this time was when we both knew.

Knew that he and I were tired of running and hiding from what we really felt.

And as we kissed on the last night of our freedom, we let go of everything we held back for years. All the games, the pain, and the walls we built came crumbling down.

Yeah, that was the moment when I belonged truly and completely to Zack Morris.