Afraid to Fall

-Back to Reality-

So a little bit if this chapter might be triggering so read if u wanna, but y'all are all beautiful and nobody can drag you down ( Yea it's a 1d reference )
But literally at one point of writing this I was crying 😂😂 Yea I'm a weenie
Here we goooo
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Chelsea's POV

My foot tapped nervously as I sat in the chair. The urges in my body began to hurt me. The urge to run, to cry, to scream.

The urge to die.
I screamed, running my fingers violently through my hair then gripped at the scalp. Small voices kept telling me all of the thing I wanted to do to myself were right (they're not btw go love ur self :) anyways)

Then I hopped up on the ledge.
The breeze refreshed me. I smiled. Knowing all that I was feeling would go away so quickly. Then my heart starting racing as a drop of reality sank in
Heights scared the shit out of me.

"Walk in the park"
"Just a walk in the park"
I kept mumbling under my breath, I looked at my black VANS as I scooted along the edge. Everything but the edge was fading away. Then I started thinking
Thinking about my mom who was on an operating table fighting for her life. It was her against one stupid tumor. Then what it's stared scattering my mind.
The worse possible senarios. Tears started flooding my eyes. I clenched my jaw trying to focus on what I was trying to do. I knew what I came up here for. I thought about Jason, the one person I loved that would never feel the same.
I wish I could just tell him the truth to just relieve myself of all the pain and anxiety it was causing.
The wind was pushing my tears behind me
"Chelsea!" I heard my name faintly behind me. I saw Jason shouting. His red cheeks stained with tears. "Come down please" he begged I looked down as I figited my toes in my sneakers. "No. I cant" I said through my gritted teeth. Wiping tears that had fallen and made its way down to my chin.
"Yes, yes I can you're scared and I know you are. I can keep you safe. Let me keep you safe just like I promised you" he said stressfully, tucking a curl behind his ear. "Just go Jason you shouldn't be here. You can't fix it this time, you're the problem. " I cried, my arms straight out at my sides as I tried keeping my balance. He loo,ed confused. "How am I the problem?"
"I can't tell you" I shout straining my voice
"I need you to make it through. I need you to be okay " he yelled
I bite my trembling lip as I shook my head no.
"I can't fake this smile anymore Jason, i just cant"
I turned to face him.
Slowly back up, my heels hung off the edge. He gasped noticing I'd lost my balance for a moment but I was able to regain it. I was breathing heavy
"Chelsea. I cant let you do this. It's my job to keep you safe. And I need to continue doing that."
I shut my eyes tightly rocking back and forth with draft from the wind. Then I heard Jason say one more thing.
"If you're gonna do this..you're leaving me knowing you left me the way everyone else does. Dead"
He knew he had to say it. And I had to hear it. Because that was the only was I could listen. They only way I could hear the truth. I was going to be like so many other people that were once in his life. My eyes opened and everything around stopped spinning. I nodded and whispered
"Okay."
He walked up to the ledge cautiously with his hand out. My hand hit his palm and I fell straight into his embrace. Tears started now pouring our of my eyes my head was buried in his chest. I felt his heart racing. I slowly fell to the ground and he fell with we me holding tighter than he's ever before. I heard him whisper thank you. I tried to catch my breath, as he gradually pushed me away then stared me in the eye. He asked me sincerely
"Please don't be like everyone else," I heard his heart breaking in his tone. And that was the only reason I wasn't up on that ledge.

Because for once in my life I wasn't afraid to fall...

......
So yeah I'm snot sure if that as good or not. But I like this chapter
There's more Jason n Chelsea drama coming up so stay tuned 😊😊
Byyyyyyeeee✌