Sad Max

(・・?)

Max was confused.

Max's POV

I woke up this morning with dry tears on my cheeks. It was a bright Monday morning in Seattle, but my mind was elsewhere. My thoughts strayed to the past week and its events, and the harsh reality of it all.

I have a crush on Adam.

I realised it last week on Thursday, but I'd been considering it for a while, that I was in love with a married man with one kid. But that wasn't the worst part.

You all know Ross. Ross, whose minecraft skin is a wonky-eyed narwhale. Ross, one of the guys who lives with me. Ross, my best friend for two years and close friend for eight. Ross, who had a crush on Adam.

Having a crush on Adam means I screw up two friendships permanently. Adam and I may not be as close as Ross and I, but I've known him for a hell of a long time and something like this could screw up my career. If I haven't mentioned already, he's my boss, so I see him basically every day. Ross and I both work at the Sky Media offices, which Adam runs, which means I not only see Adam's face every day but also Ross's when he's around Adam.

All I see is my best friend happy. And I'd never want to screw that up, not in a million years. His day is literally made by Adam bounding into his office.

It's not like I can pretend I don't know about his crush either. Ross told me a while ago about his feelings towards Adam and I helped him try to understand. This was long before I knew of my own feelings. Last week I asked Ross if he still felt the same way about Adam, and he confirmed my worries.

You see, I never keep secrets from Ross if they're big. The only other person I planned on sharing this with was Tim Tim, who tried to convince me that Ross and Adam didn't like each other. He may have been half right, I don't know about Adam's feelings, but they seem so close around each other. Anyway, because of the circumstances, I can't tell Ross. He might hate me, or get overprotective of Adam and not want me near him. There is not a single way this would turn out alright if I told him.

In all honesty, I wouldn't date Adam. I would rather bare the weight of a lonely heart than guilt. I have felt too much guilt in my time and not nearly enough heartbreak, and guilt lasts a lot longer. I don't want to be the one who caused their best friend's heart to break. I don't want to be the one who loses two of their closest friends due to a stupid crush. I just have to wait for it to pass.

I really don't want to go to work this morning.