I Am Offering This Scarf

Chapters 16 & 17

Chapter 16- Love Love Love

"It's the night before you leave John, please?" Sherlock trails his lips down my jaw.

"No, Sherlock, I may be old fashioned, but not yet." I pull his face up to meet my eyes. As hard as it is to tell him no... "Not until after the wedding."

He pouts. "Fine." One more hasty kiss is planted on my lips before he walks off down the hallway, pulling his shirt off along the way.

I glance back at the suitcases in the living room and a shudder runs down my spine. I don't want to go. At first, I hadn't really cared, but now... Now the reason I have to stay is even stronger. I sigh. I won't be gone that long. Walking slowly down the hallway, I stroke the walls with my fingertips. It'll be the last time I'll spend the night in this flat with Sherlock before I leave. The question keeps echoing in my brain, What if I don't come back?

I slip inside the bedroom, my pajamas already on, and get under the covers. Sherlock sighs, relieved, and wraps his arms around me. "It took you long enough."

"I couldn't have been more than a minute." I say defensively.

He cups one of his hands under my chin. "That's still too long." He pulls me in for a soft kiss. Not like earlier's.

I pull away. "Sherlock, I don't know how long I'll be gone."

His eyes are understanding. "I know, John. It shouldn't be that long though." He adds. He rests his chin on top of my head. "I don't want you to leave, John."

"War is not something you can turn off and on." I whisper. I want this night to be different from the others, but I don't know how to make it that way. "Sherlock, I want to spend all of the rest of my moments in London with you."

"Oh trust me, the feeling's mutual." He faintly starts humming a song. It's wonderful. I never had any idea he could sing. But I guess when you play an instrument, you have to have an ear for tone.

"What song is that?" A yawn escapes my mouth. It sounds vaguely familiar.

"Ever heard of Of Monsters and Men?" He replies in way of answer.

I close my eyes and shake my head. "Unless you mean the novel, no."

He chuckles. "They sing a song called Love Love Love. I'm pretty sure it's the one of the best songs I've ever heard."

My legs curl up. I'm starting to fall asleep. "Please sing it..."

He sighs as he moves the hair out of my face. "Okay John..."

Chapter 17- Just a Dream...
Sherlock's POV

At some point John fades off into his dreams. I stop singing. Don't even hum. I'll tell him tomorrow that I sang past the time he faded. You know, maybe he's not dreaming. There's really not a way for me to know, although I wish I did. If he were dreaming about me. About tomorrow.

Irene had been warning me. That he's not coming back. When she told me to say it back, I didn't realize what she was talking about at first. Then Mycroft, of all people, tells him he has to leave. Back across the world. We'll be too far apart for me to save him. This is John's version of his 'Reichenbach Fall'. Moriarty will make sure he's done in at his own game. I don't want to say goodbye. Don't want for John to die. Telling him is, most definitely, not an option. I knew this would go bad. Sentiment. It's being used against us. Against me. Moriarty is using John to get to me. All because he's bored...

I won't be able to get there soon enough. They won't crash the plane, but it won't be very long after. It'll probably happen right when he gets there.

I look down at John. My John. A soft smile spreads across my lips. I never really smiled until I knew him. I run my fingers through his hair.

I hope it happens quick.

So quick that he doesn't know what happened and he wakes up dead. Or doesn't wake up. Whatever floats your boat. They'll come to my door. "Mr. Holmes?"

"Yes?" I'll say.

He'll inform me that he died for the country. Died doing work plenty of others didn't want to do.

I can't cry for John. I'm past tears. They wouldn't do he or I any good.

I need to sleep. Although I don't want to, I must face tomorrow.

The airport shall be a grim place.