From Up Above

Lost

          I focused my attention outside the classroom window as I entered, the buzz of gossip filled my ears and pained my intelligence. I thought of how the rain fell sloppily in thick droplets, such a contrast to the bright yellow jerseys and pepped up students inside. I sat in my regular far sided row, nearest the door. The bell had rung, the sound slightly muffled and broken, the same it had been for the last three years I have known it. How long has it been? I tapped my pencil impatiently. How long has he been gone?

        The teacher droned on about Ancient Greece, "Cameron, you can tell us your theory, correct?" My head shot up, he stares at me questionably, but all I can take in are the dark circles that dented deeply into his wrinkled skin. I let out a small sound, it was more choked up than an actual beginning of a legible sentence.
Remembering we were suppose to select a Greek theory, then write beginning to end, our opinion on every mind wrenching factor, "Seems you get a failing grade, yet again."

I mentally slapped myself, a sick feeling erupted in my stomach. I have never missed an assignment so why can't I remember something this simple? I'm becoming such a failure! The lunch bell finally rang, and I grabbed my papers and bolted as fast as humanly possible, for someone like myself anyway.

       "She had breasts like.." I continued past the group of sports players, Paul made a cupped gesture far from his chest, disgusting. Being outside was a negative today, and so was the auditorium due to the drama clubs interference, so I guess I have to resort to the just walking around for an entire 60 minutes of hell, or you could go home, my mind whispered. The next two periods aren't necessary to actually show up for, right? I skipped the classic signing myself out and calling a parent ordeal, and just left. My small baby pink truck looked ragged and worn against all the new shiny paint jobs, not to mention the compensation.

       Dad wasn't home, of course that workaholic couldn't sit still and relax, even when.. I shut the door, Jane was sprawled out on the pull out couch, a bottle of something strong spilled all over the beige carpeting, this woman is what you'd call my biological mother.

       My bedroom wasn't a bedroom at all, it's a laundry room converted into a stuffy windowless living space, this is because they expected to only have one kid. I know what you're thinking, siblings share. Well my brother, he wasn't like that. I don't mention wasn't, because he changed. He was the same hard headed boy up until his death, right before high school graduation. Poor Cameron that's all I hear, What a pity, that's all they can say.

       February 5th, the calendar was slanted, today was two years since Clays death. He was a senior, I was a freshman both of us went to a party, well he went and I sat outside in the car and eventually just walked home, it was only three blocks. I woke up to a policeman talking to my father, and my mothers faint sobs outside. My brother had overdosed on some mixed up form of drug they were passing around at the party.
Clay was a popular guy, he never associated himself with me, he had dirty blonde hair accompanied by crystal blue eyes from my mother, and I had my dads dark hair and dirty blue eyes, how can blue be dirty? I can't explain my selected adjective just know you'd understand me if you witnessed them.

       I changed into something casual, walking out of the house I noticed the rain stopped, everything seemed so dead. Including me. My phone vibrated, a number without a name. "Hello?" I muttered at least audibly, They hung up, what the hell.
I shrugged it off as a wrong number or a prank.

      Gus's gas and grill was about a mile from my home, which is where I always went, sitting at the sixties themed counters. "Good afternoon, what can I get you Hun." A thick southern accent, and cheap pink lipstick, Janice was in her mid twenties and quit high school. "Two orders of the six wing special, and a Diet Pepsi." She scrawled it down in purple glitter pen sending a fake smile towards me before disappearing into the kitchen doors.

         "Cameron, you know it's about time.." Eveline, Clays best friend growing up. She was short, easily a half a foot shorter than me, she wore glasses and her black hair was pulled into a messy bun, she was tan and her voice was gentle. She wanted to be a writer, and she could of easily had done just that, she had a way with words that radiated strength and honesty.

       Janice sat the food down, I gave her my card and payed, giving my food up to some boy sitting to my right, I exited the diner as fast as I had entered. Eveline stood by my side, neither of us said a word, we just walked in the sprinkling rain to the Willow tree that symbolized Clays last wish.

       When we were younger Clay and I would climb this tree and pretend the world was flooding and whoever didn't reach the top would drown, he always won, and one time I even fell out and broke my elbow!

       A small smile spread on my lips, "He wasn't as bad as his reputation lead you to believe, you know.." She nodded in agreement, knowing how torn I was inside and out. I sat gym style in front of the Oak cross decorated with pictures, flowers, and all sorts of memories. I took the envelope out of my pocket, the words were scrawled in tidy cursive font,

Dear Cam.