To Bid You Farewell

Chapter II

Jason wondered off towards the big kitchen - the only place in the castle that wasn't covered from floor to ceiling with oak panels and dark stone- and located two mugs. As he waited for the water to heat, his head was storming with a million thoughts. Of course, he thought, the only thing that can ruin this night was Joanna, and here she is. Jason pulled himself into control and kept a silent prayer, pleading God not to tempt him.

He finished preparing their beverages and carried them upstairs to find Joanna. The castle was big and dark. One could get lost in it for hours and would still not be able to find his way back. But Joanna wasn't a newcomer to the castle. She had spent almost an entire year living here. Jason passed the hallways of the second floor, heading to the guest chambers at the far east end of the place when he saw the door to his father's study cracked open.

"Don't you know snooping around isn't an act of a good house guest," he said. Joanna didn't turn.

"I've never been here before," she answered, still admiring some of his father's trinkets: his PhD in history from Cambridge, his rare collection of some of Leonardo da Vinci's writings, and the painting of The Card Players. The study was big and spacious, yet was cluttered all over the place with exotic curios and various other items which Jason couldn't understand half of.

"For good reason. Father never lets anyone here without supervision. Not even me." Jason remembered sneaking into his father's study only once before, when he was nine. It was his father's forty-fifth birthday and Jason decided to buy his father a small antiqued clock to add to his trinkets. His father smiled and said it was beautiful; he placed it in the topmost corner of his bookshelf - 'to keep it safe'. Jason sneaked in a few days later, climbed the shelf, took the clock, and returned it to the shop. His father never noticed it was gone.

Joanna was now staring at Sir Charles Daughtery's GBE, rewarded for his outstanding contributions to the world of academia.

"Your shoes are ruining the carpet," Jason winced at the sight of her mud-soaked ankle boots dirtying the expensive and exotic carpets of his father's study.

"Oh, sorry. Yeah, I'll just go wash off," Joanna exited the room and headed off towards her old room.

Her old room. The sight of Joanna walking around the castle again gave Jason an echoing sense of déjà vu; it was like seeing the ghost of the past three years alive again. Jason followed her slowly, partly to make sure she doesn't wander off into another forbidden quarter again, and partly because he couldn't stop his feet from following her wherever she went.

Joanna located the room that has been solely hers for almost a full year, and stepped in, stopping once to breathe in the nostalgic view of the room.

She turned back to look at him. "Thank you, really, for letting me stay tonight." Jason nodded.

He set the two steaming mugs on the dresser. "Umm, I'll wait for you outside – "

"No, stay," she turned slightly pink, "I'll be out in a second. Just stay here." Joanna pulled a dressing gown from the dresser and hurried towards the bathroom.

Jason turned and sat down in the cozy leather armchair in the corner.

God, please don't let this night turn into what I think it will.

It had taken Jason a long time (and a lot of whiskey) to get over Joanna. And he's quite sure he's still not over her completely. His new obsession with Valerie was merely a petty attempt at trying to deflect the break up's effect on him.

Yet here she is. Just like it was before. In his house; in her room. Jason's stomach has been churning butterflies ever since he saw her figure in his window. He willed himself some strength and focused all his efforts into staying grounded. Digest those butterflies.

Jason could hear the steaming water from the shower running, and the steam started leaking from under the bathroom's door. Jason sipped his tea idly and waited for Joanna to get out. The rain was hammering against the windows harder and harder. Jason feared for a storm when he heard a few cracks of thunder.

Joanna finally got out a few minutes later, and Jason averted his eyes. All that Joanna had on was the crimson bathrobe that wasn't even tightly shut.

Joanna looked at Jason and read his expression. "If this is making you uncomfortable I can go put on something else."

"It's alright," he said, "aren't you cold?"

Joanna settled herself on the bed and dried her wet hair with a towel. "Yeah a bit."

They both stayed silent for a few minutes as Joanna absentmindedly dried her hair. Her face was now clean and clear; all the mascara smears were now gone, and except for the faint hint of her puffy eyes, there was no indication to her having cried.

Jason finally broke the tense silence between them. "So what happened?"

"Liam's going back to Ireland," Joanna said, absentmindedly staring through the floor of the room as she sipped her warm beverage, "he used to tell me that when he goes he was gonna take me with him. Now he's saying that he can't." Joanna kept an eerily neutral face and Jason didn't know what to answer. The entire conversation was awkward to him and he knew that anything he might say will either sound biased, judgmental, or hypocritical, so he remained silent.

"Look, I know this whole thing is weird and uncomfortable. I really appreciate you letting me stay," Joanna said when Jason didn't reply.

"No worries, you can stay as long as you like." He got up and headed for the door, seeing this as the best plan of action. "If you need anything I'll be in my room."