daydream. // jalec + malec

the one we love the most.

Although Alec was oddly content with the way things were, he couldn't pretend that some days were harder to get through than others. Most of the time, it was fairly easy to be around Jace, to interact with and fight beside him, temporarily pushing his feelings aside. Ater all, in his own words, emotions were nothing more than a distraction, especially when there were more pressing matters at hand. He could even fake a smile once in a while, an act that even he admitted didn't happen often enough for anyone to notice whether the expression was truly genuine or not. Alec had his dreams, and although they provided him with at least a little comfort, sometimes they simply weren't enough.

When Alec would awake to find that Jace wasn't beside him as he had previously been imagining, the pain would hit him in the same way a tsunami would ravage a defenseless city, and he would have to all but force his legs to move. Sitting on the end of the bed and staring down at his shaking hands he would eventually stand, slipping on his leather jacket and taking a quick glance at the reflection he saw in the mirror. He would put on a brave face, wiping his red-rimmed eyes and taking a number of deep breaths, doing these actions until he was certain that he was okay enough to face the rest of the world. Alec would step out of his room, closing the door gently behind him and making his way down the corridor lined with stained-glass windows that caused red, green, and blue prisms to filter down upon the carpet.

It was when he entered the main area of the Shadowhunters institution and saw him, the light shining onto his features and proving what an angel he truly was, that it took everything Alec had not to simply turn around, wanting nothing more than to return to his bed and the solace of the dreams that came with it. Being around Jace was becoming more and more of a daily struggle, Alec avoiding as much contact as he possibly could, but most importantly, never allowing Jace to look into his eyes, for fear of what he may see reflected in them. This was a task that was easier said than done, however, and sometimes Alec simply couldn't help himself, his gaze finding its way to Jace even without it being a conscious effort. He was drawn to him, in every sense of the word, and although he could mask his sadness, it was impossible to completely hide both the physical and emotional attraction he felt towards Jace.

On this particular Thursday morning, when the wind caused the branches of the trees outside to buckle and bend under the force of yet another winter storm, there was a sense of looming disaster floating around the four walls, a sort of foreboding that none of the inhabitats could see, yet all of them could feel. Alec couldn't pinpoint why or what this evil was; all he knew was that he himself was feeling particuarly miserable, the rain that fell outside of the window matching his mood perfectly, the dark skies mirroring the darkness inside of him.

He, along with Izzy and Clary, were currently seated in the makeshift living room, a space that was nothing more than a cramped area with three chairs and a faded loveseat positioned in the corner, between a row of wooden bookshelves lined with thick layers of dust. The two women were chattering animatedly about some sort of new fashion item, while Alec was simply there, staring blankly off into space. "What a beautiful day."

He heard Jace's approach before he saw him, appearing from somewhere upstairs. The black T-shirt he was wearing was lined with various creases and wrinkles, Alec taking notice of the way the article of clothing stretched across his broad chest and showed the muscles hiding underneath. His blonde hair lay messy and uncombed atop his head, still damp from his shower, the scent of his aftershave reaching Alec's nostrils in the most intoxicating of ways. It was evident that Jace had just awoken and was still not fully put together, but Alec had never remembered a time in which the man before him had looked so flawless, so much so that the act of looking anywhere but at him seemed impossible. Clary seemed to take notice as well, jumping out of her seat and running to meet him, throwing her arms around his waist, Jace leaning down to gently place his lips against her forehead. The smile that he gave the red-haired girl caused that same crushing pain to creep into Alec's chest, Izzy turning her head slightly to give her brother a knowing sympathetic glance before turning back towards the embracing couple. "The weatherman said this storm was supposed to last through the weekend; something about a blizzard coming in from the North."