iMakeover (an iCarly Story)

4. Blue over Brown

The title is referring to Freddie's diary entry. You'll see. You'll all see. Hahahaha-*chokes on spit* crawls away in shame.

Freddie's POV

We're about halfway through the second movie when Sam starts complaining she's cold, so I jokingly suggest we move the party to my room. I promptly get slapped but then she gets up and heads for my room anyway. I get up and go into the kitchen to make some more popcorn before following her.

When I finally reach my room, I find her curled up on my bed reading my journal. Jesus Christ, I leave her alone for five minutes and she already finds some way to humiliate the hell out of me.

"Hey!"

I toss the bowl of popcorn on the table next to my bed and yank the book out of her hands, looking to see what page she's on. Fortunately, it's not anything too bad.

It reads:

'Today, Carly's hair was shining just right as she flipped it. Her eyes were shining too. I bet Carly would look even prettier with green eyes, or maybe blue. I've always loved blue eyes. But Carly makes up for it with her sweet personality and cute skirts and blouses.'

"I thought you said you were over Carly?" Sam asks frowning.

I smirk a little. "Jealous?"

She makes a face at me and I laugh, handing the journal back to her.

"Look at the date at the top." I say.

She does. "Oh."

"Yeah." It's dated three and a half years ago.

"I wrote that right after my fourteenth birthday." I tell her. "And even then, I was starting to change my mind about her. Just a little bit each day. Like how I dissed the color of her eyes in that entry."

She stays silent for a few seconds before looking up at me.
"When did you give up on her all together? Or have you?" She asks, surprising me with the seriousness of her tone.

"Well, it's not that I gave up on her. I still honestly think that one day, she might come around. The only difference is, now I don't care." I pause. "Or actually, I do care. I really don't want her to like me like that because it would ruin our friendship.

"It felt like I liked her a little less each day, until she could hug me or kiss me on the cheek, and I'd start thinking about what I was having for dinner that night or something like that. Those little idle touches stopped mattering to me until it got to the point where I didn't even notice them anymore. Honestly Sam, if you had told me when I was twelve that in four or five years, I would find the idea of marrying Carly repulsive, I'd have had you medicated."

Sam giggles, and then blushes at the girly sound of it, looking angry with herself. I smile, deciding that might just be my new favorite sound.

"One day, maybe I'd notice her smile seemed a little less perfect or her voice wasn't as appealing to me as before. Finally, I realized when we dated after that whole taco truck incident that my feelings for her had become totally platonic. When she kissed me, I felt nothing. No sparks or butterflies. The only thing I felt was surprise that she had finally returned my feelings and it turned out I didn't wanted them anymore. That I didn't want her anymore. And then you said that thing about me probably being just bacon and I decided that if neither of us liked each other, why should we keep up the dating thing?"

"Huh."

"Yeah. I first began to realize my crush was going away a few days after New Years of 2009. I couldn't be absolutely sure, of course, but I felt like I was getting over it." I knew that I was pushing it but I couldn't resist. We had kissed January 3, 2009 and to this day, I still consider it to be the best kiss I've ever had, which is so strange. One little 'just to get it over with' kiss with the girl who made my life hell was better than all of the kisses and make out sessions with all my other past girlfriends combined.