Gone Forever

4 / Third Year

Well.

Third year came rolling towards our lives like a shooting star.

We passed our second year, we both were in the top 5 of the school for academics,

as expected from the 'nerd couple.'

The nickname given to us by many of the students in our school.

But you know what?

We didn't care what they thought of us.

We minded our own business and ignored the thoughts and opinions of everyone.

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Third year was a tough one.

Because we both thought grades were more important,

we focused more on school,

rather than our friendship.

I remember one time when I went up to him,

asking him if he wanted to go out to the park with me.

He angrily said "Can't you see that I'm busy?! I obviously don't have enough time for your little play dates!"

That time his eyes didn't look warm anymore.

They were full of anger, and of course stress.

"U-uh I'm sorry Yoongi." I murmured as guilt began flowing through me. 

He didn't reply.

Nor did he look up at me.

He continued to do his work.

I guess that would be called our first fight? 

It was short, quick and very meaningless. 

I didn't expect him to get so mad over something like asking to go to the park with me. 

But third year is the most important year of high school, 

so I had to be more understanding. 

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Not many things happened this year,

we focused on our studies more because if not, 

we wouldn't be able to find a university. 

It's the third year's results that count for our university entrance. 

We didn't hang out less or anything, 

we just talked less. 

Even though we were sitting right in front of each other in that one table at the library.

That table, the destination of  where fate brought us together. 

By the end of third year, everything went back to before. 

Our results were good, in fact they were actually the best in the whole school. 

When third year ended, things were getting even better. 

We hung out a lot, 

and by a lot I mean everyday. 

We did everything together. 

Eating, shopping, going out, and everything else you would do on a typical day. 

We would go and eat meat everyday. 

Meat was his favourite food. 

I wonder if that's changed after she appeared. 

Third year was also the year where he auditioned for BIGHIT. 

I don't think I've ever mentioned his passion for music. 

He loved music more than anything. 

He would write song lyrics for me, 

sing for me, 

and dance for me.  

I loved him. 

He won 2nd place in the auditions. 

We celebrated by going out to this fancy restaurant. 

I still cannot forget the expressions on his face after he had passed the auditions. 

His captivating smile had melted my heart,

and his dreamy eyes had captured my soul. 

The thing is, 

after he had passed the auditions, things became busier for him. 

He was spending majority of his time practicing with six other members. 

They became really close, in such a short time. 

We spent less time together, especially after school. 

The only times we could meet was during the morning before school and sometimes at night. 

"Na In, I think you should come join us when we're doing our rehearsals," he had told me looking worried. 

"But I don't want to distract you." I replied to him not even looking at him in the eyes. 

"It'll be fine," he smiled at me, "everything will be fine."  

He introduced me to the other six members in their band, Bangtan Sonyeondan (BTS). 

They were all so dreamy looking. 

After that, I spent more time with them while they were practicing. 

I helped them out in every possible way. 

I didn't want to feel like a nuisance to them. 

I noticed that Yoongi was changing, 

in a good way. 

He was more open and sociable now. 

He wasn't so conservative anymore. 

He talked more with others, and he was much less quiet than before. 

I was so happy that he was changing. 

I too, on the other hand, 

was changing. 

Was it for the good? 

Or for the bad? 

I still don't know. 

I became closer with his group of friends, especially Jeon Jeongguk. 

The youngest in their group. 

We were hanging out more as well. 

We did a lot of things together while Yoongi wasn't there. 

He changed me a lot,

and I'm very thankful for that. 

I became more confident, mature and brave, 

unlike the shy and quiet person I used to be. 

Slowly the school began noticing Bangtan's popularity and my closeness with them. 

Girls wanted to befriend me, 

but I never wanted to be their friend. 

I stayed with Bangtan for the next year, our fourth and final year of high school. 

During this year, I learnt about more things with them, 

I learnt how to dress better, I grew my hair out long and straight, and slowly, girls began to look up to my change. 

But one thing was, 

my grades. 

My grades, 

they were falling behind. 

I wasn't the nerd I used to be anymore.