REVERSE | ✔

g u i l t

I want to get this over with, good news for you guys. second part to this will be posted later today.

++

I sat crouching in the parking lot in the space between two cars.

My hands gripped my head. Not because it was hurting but because I wanted to rip it out open and bring an end to the never ending voices inside it.

There were two sides to these voices. Both battling against the other, clashing and screeching.

The words they uttered were dissolving into each other and I couldn't comprehend what they were compelling me to do.

Some words distinctly stood out.

Monster. Bully.

WHAT DID SHE EVER DO TO YOU?

A faint whisper of die.

LEAVE HER ALONE

you're turning into him.

she's just like you.

just like you.

like you.

you.

Suddenly, images of her during different situations began flashing in front of my eyes.

Her face when she realised what will happen to her. Her expression at realising that no one is going to help her. The look in her eyes when ever I used her as my own personal punching bag.

Her, wincing as she tried to stand up straight. Her, limping in the corridors. Her, rushing to the toilet to cover up the bruises.

Her absences when I sometimes got extra harsh on her.

Her...everything.

Her.

I noticed it all. Yet I felt no remorse.

Until now. Until this moment.

I'm sure she's uttered the same two words countless number of times to many but now that I've heard her saying them herself, I desperately tried to grasp onto the thin thread of reality.

This is what I've been doing for the past few months and I couldn't be more ashamed of myself.

Suddenly our roles were reversed.
I was there, standing in her place. Uttering the same exact words to someone concerned.

Everything was black and white. I saw the pity. I saw the longing to help.

In a flash, I gasped and colours flashed in a blur. I was still in the parking lot.

I looked around with fearful eyes, panting. What if he's looking for me?

After all this time, what if he wants revenge?

What if he was bailed out?

What if...What if...What if

I can't let him find me.

I can't let Joseph find me.

I can't.

I had to get out of here. I need to get out of here.