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"Hey man, want to go on a job today?" Bickslow says to Freed.
"Not today, Laxus and I are going on a date. We will be back tonight." Freed says while getting up and walks away. Bickslow sighs and scans the room. He sees Evergreen and quickly gets up. He walks over but before he can reach her, Elfman walks over and kisses her. Bickslow sighs and leans over. He looks around again to see if anyone wanted to go on a job. He quickly walks over to Lucy and Natsu.
"Uh, hey guys. Would you maybe want to go on a job?" He asks loudly. He didn't know them very well but he was hoping they would want to go.
"No thanks Bickslow, but maybe some other time! We just got back from one anyways." Lucy says cheerfully to him. The tall man gives her a fake smile and turns around. His smile falls immediately and he walks out the doors into the evening light quickly. Loneliness quickly settles upon him as he puts his hands in his pockets. He walks back towards the Thunder Legion's house, mind racing.
'No one wants to spend time with you. Why would they? You can't control your powers and you have dolls as friends.' He thought to himself. As he reaches the front door, he lifts his hands to his mask's straps and unbuckles them. He opens the door and looks at the mask now in his hands.
"What a joke." He whispers to himself and slams the door shut while tossing the mask on the couch. He takes a quick look around the dark room and looks at the picture frames. His eyes narrow at the picture where they all are smiling brightly at the camera. It was taken about 4 months ago and it was one of the last times they all went on a job together. He walks over slowly and picks it up. He stares at it for another second before throwing it back, next to his mask. He walks to his bathroom and strips out of his clothes quickly. He turns on the water and sits into the cold water of the bath, the dark thoughts seeping into his brain.
'No one wants to go on a job with you.'
'No one wants to be with the weakest person on the team.'
'Can't control myself, if I lost control I could go overboard and rip their soul out. I'm weak but for me too be strong, I would hurt my team.'
An angry scream is ripped out of his throat and he grips his face tightly with his hands, back hunched and tears escaping. He opens his eyes, blurry from the tears and he spots it on the counter, sitting there like a stain on his existence. His razor. Without thinking, he grabs it and sits back down in the water. Gazing at the razor, he lifts his arm and rests the blade down. Turning his head slightly, he runs it quickly across his arm and blood drips down into the water.
'Useless.' Another cut.
'Failure.' Another.
'Loner.' One more. He hisses in pain and he puts the razor down, still stained in his blood, like many times before. He throws his head back against the wall and he lowers his arm into the water, a sob escaping his throat. He immediately clams up and gets out of the bath, not wanting to be in the water for another second, thinking he might do something he regrets. He throws a towel on and goes back into his room, making sure the door is locked. He drops his towel and lays down on the bed and pulls the blanket over his naked form. Shivering wildly as the blood leaks out of the four new cuts on his arm. He slowly drifts asleep, tears streaking his face and blood staining the bed.
