When I'm Gone

Chapter Sixteen: Death and Souls

"Why?" I asked. "Why would he care?"

Gabe sighed and rubbed his temple. "Because you need it. You're reckless and you're going to get yourself and others killed."

"I don't want it."

My brother pursed his lips and stood up, his small frame glaring up at me. "You don't have a choice."

I opened my mouth to contradict him, when two other angels grabbed my arms, pinning me to the wall. "Let go of me," I growled, trying to wrench myself from their steely grips.

Suddenly, Death himself appeared in front of me, carrying a small black bag in his hands. I narrowed my eyes as he set the bag on the table, opening it up to reveal a bright blue glow.

He turned to me. "Castiel, not only will I be returning your soul, I will also be returning your grace." He picked up the ball of flame in his gloved hand and stepped closer to me. "Unlike the Winchester, I will not put a memory wall up for you. This will hurt," he said as he began pushing my soul back into my chest.

I screamed as the hot light slowly embedded itself in my sternum. It was an agonizingly slow process, the small tongues of flame arcing their way through my veins.

All I could do was attempt to twist out of my brothers' grips. Unfortunately for me, they held on tight. My back arched in pain as my soul sent rivers of lighting coursing through my body.

Then, it was over. Not a single ache was throbbing to remind me of the agony I had suffered moments before.

I gasped, trying to catch my breath. My brothers let go of my arms and disappeared, their wings smacking me in the face as I fell to the ground.

Death's thin lips parted into a smile as he squatted in front of me, his bony fingers handing me a small vial that was emanating a blue glow. "Your grace, Castiel. You can use it however you like."

I took my life out of his hands, and felt my fist clench around the glass. "I..." There was nothing I could think of to say.

"You're welcome, Castiel," Death said, puffing away in a cloud of black smoke.

I coughed and felt a soft hand helping me stand up. "Gabe-"

My brother laughed, "Don't say anything, Cassie. You'll ruin the moment."

"Thank you."

"See? I knew you needed the help. I said to myself, 'Self, my baby bro Cassie needs help getting into his big-girl panties.' So, I came along and helped you into them. And how do they feel?"

I rolled my eyes. Gabriel will be Gabriel. "It feels good. I feel human again. I... feel again."

"Good," he smiled softly. "Then my work here is done."

I pulled him into a hug just as he was preparing to leave. "I owe you, Gabriel."

He laughed again, the vibrations buzzing through my chest as he hugged me back. "I'll be sure to remember that, Cassie."

And then, he was gone; leaving me alone in my room with piles of shattered glass surrounding me. I carefully stepped over them and put my grace on the nightstand, picking up my phone.

YOU HAVE 37 NEW VOICEMAILS

I unlocked it and stared at the list of missed calls.

Dean
Dean
Dean
Dean
Dean

They were all from him. My heart skipped a beat as I played the first one.

"Cas, please pick up. I'm sorry for everything, Cas. Sam and I... We need you. I need you, Cas..." he trailed off, hanging up the phone.

I sighed and played the next message. "Cas, it's still me. Call me back. I need you. Please, Cas. I..." he stopped himself again.

Gritting my teeth, I played the last message, skipping over another couple dozen in the process. "Cas, it's been nearly three months. I'm worried about you. Please, Cas. Call me back. Sammy and I want to help you."

He paused and I thought it was the end of the message. Right as I was about to hang up, I heard in a small voice, "I love you, Castiel."