Koi No Yokan

I'm sure I saw you before you saw me.

And you took my breath away.

However, that was only the first time, with many other occasion sure to follow.

It was at a bustling airport when our eyes first met, and oh god, they were so incredibly dark, and unfairly warm.

Those two things don't quite match up.

Darkness for some reason is inherently evil, it's portrayed as something to avoid, something only light, good, can combat.

Mostly, it's because of instinctual fear that originates from the stone age.

The absence of light meant nightfall, when predators hunted, tore into their prey like paper. Fire fought them off, representing hope, and safety to the very first homo erectus.

As long as there was light, there was life.

So, if anything, your eyes should've been alarming, causing sticky, hot panic to coat my stomach, or intruding, like a pair of cold hands underneath my shirt in the middle of the night.

(Yet, they weren't.)

If your eyes could've been a person, it would that certain someone in a crowd whose face made it past the filter that blurred stranger's faces and ignored unimportant details.

That someone who had a strange sense of familiarity following them around the room, calling on an unbidden wave of nostalgia that surged unwanted memories upon my thoughts.

But when what should've been a flood of choppy, hazy, and unsure reel of scenes from another life, came nothing. It left my mouth dry, craving water, or something else entirely.

The hue of your irises were impossible to pin point.

It was like closing my eyes, then trying to guess what color stained my vision.

A part of me was sure, the logical part, that scared away monsters creeping at the fuzzy lines of shadows, and combated the unrealistic fears clawing at my throat, that they were a dark brown, nearly black (like a tea bag steeped in water for too long, or blood clotting in a wound until it turned a nasty color of pain and death).

Then the other half (the one you know so well), controlled by my forever unstable emotions, easily influenced by words and distant memories, wasn't easily convinced.

Your eyes, they looked like a galaxy of burning infernos and doomed planets. It made me ashamed that I had the audacity to regard myself as someone special.

Sometimes (just sometimes) I wished it had stopped there.

That I had just turn my head down and watch my feet scuff against the polished tile, going back home to a boring life looming with deadlines and disappointment.

But, of course I had to smile at you, a full blown grin teaming with confidence and pure radiance, instead of the usual small upturn of the lips that read "leave me alone".

All because I woke up happy that day, joy filling every inch of my body, leaving some left over to bleed through my translucent skin.

(How naive I was.)

Your entire body went rigid, as if you were surprised I noticed you. In your eyes (those beautiful, captivating voids of nothingness) I must've looked out of your reach, with my 500 watt beam, shock white hair, and two more piercings than what my dad approved of (six, it makes six).

In reality, it was the opposite.

With black, short hair framing your face, and dusty brown skin that reminded me of sun dried leather (even though your skin was anything but dry), it was impossible to tear my eyes away.

After all, dark skin stands out in a field of pale.

(So does desire, in a stretch of apathy.)

((A/N: ahhh this is my first story so go easy on me, and if you like it follow me I guess??? I will publish another story, something with an actual plot and clear characters, so just be patient with me. Thanks for all the support!!!!))