Dear Bestfriend,
A lot has happened since I've moved schools. You've managed to crawl out of your shy ways and snagged yourself a boyfriend. While sadly, I have not. I've always compared myself to you. And it sucks that we're so similar in so many ways, so its kind of hard not to. We're both Filipinos and we have too many similarities that it's to hard to list down ever single one. It's easy to say that most of my insecurities stem from you. No, not because you're mean or because you call me names, you know you've never done those things to me. But because you're everything I strive to be.
You're pretty, outgoing, confident in yourself, smart and skinny. Things I wish I could be every single day. Things that I try to be every single day. I'm often jealous of you and how you look because you're perfect in my eyes. I know it's not good to be jealous of your bestfriend, especially something that's based on appearance, but you're a daily reminder of everything I am not. Sometimes it hurts me. To be really honest, sometimes it hurts to see how I'm always second best compared to you.
Despite my very selfish thoughts, you're on of the most important people to ever enter my life. I've had a lot of so-called bestfriends in the past, but you're the one that has stuck around the longest. Sometimes I think about if I had never met you. If I had never gone to ARC and had my way and enrolled to a less dangerous highschool. Then I would think about all the times we had and how the wouldn't exist anymore. It's hard not having my sidekick with me every single day, since I've moved schools and suburbs.
I would be lying if I said we were still as close as before. It's hard for me to say that we are more distant now. Reasons being for me moving schools, assignments, part time jobs and boyfriends. You've told me you love him and I'm so happy for you. You guys make an amazing couple but sometimes I wish you would see that he keeps pulling you away from me. I barely get to see you nowadays and when I do, he's always there. I end up thirdwheeling when all I wanted was a girl's day. I just wish that you would give each other a break sometimes and maybe for a change give me your full undivided attention. Right now, that's all I want for you. Please don't push me away. I've never known what it's like to fall in love and I know that you have, but please don't let our friendship fade away. I'm really trying, I am trying so hard to still hang out and do what we used to do but it's one-sided.
I miss my bestfriend...
I love you please don't let our 2 year friendship die down like this.
From, your side hoe xx
YOU ARE READING
My 30 Letters
Non-FictionI wrote these letters a while back and I kept contemplating what I was going to do with them. I wanted to keep it a secret, but I wanted someone else to read it to. In my opinion, if letters aren't read, then what's the point of writing them in the...
