Swan Song (A Cody Carson Fanfiction)(Completed)

Swan Song - Chapter 16

                  

"Hey, sorry I'm late."

I sit down, sliding into the booth as Cody's lips tug into a slight smile. I give a slight smile back as I look over where Austin is, sitting, tapping his foot waiting for me even though I already showed up. Sadly I didn't show up for him.

"Hey Alice."

I look back at him and quickly take the jacket off and hide it behind my back. I don't want Cody to see me having Austin's jacket, questions will be asked, anger will rise and I'll be paralyzed underneath him like every other time.

"Hey Cody, so you wanted to talk to me?"

He nods slightly, offering me anything to drink but I turn it down with a shake of the head. We both sit here, not saying a word as I my eyes dart to Austin, seeing if he'll get up or look over.

"What happened at the concert? I got drunk at a party and I only remember bits and pieces."

I look at Cody, snapping out of my daze and scoff slightly. I find it bullshit that he thinks that I'll believe he was drunk. He would never drink in front of kids as he's meeting him, he's not like that. Then again, I don't know what he's like anymore.

"A lot of stuff happened Cody, where do you want me to start?"

"Just tell me everything, because I know I was going to talk to you after the concert but I have no clue how it ended."

It ended so badly Cody, so badly that I told you to stay away but here I am. Here I am, talking to you, reliving that night even though I just want to forget it.

I let out a long and heavy sigh as I fix my glasses.

"Well when you did the acoustic set you invited me up to sing, during the concert you directed a song towards me which was great and at the end you kissed me."

All he does is sit there, eyes slightly wide and mouth gapping open retaining the information he got.

"That's what happened?"

He's in a little bit of shock, actually surprised he would do anything. Maye he was drunk, maybe he went to a party and got completely wasted so he is telling the truth about not remembering what happened. Whatever he does or doesn't remember it seems like he's remembering it now.

All I do is nod, again looking towards Austin as he now gets up, paying for his drink. We make eye contact as walks out to leave. I just give a small smile, reading sorry and other types of sentences and words. He just nods and sends a small faint smile back, understanding what situation I'm in.

I look away as Cody runs a hand through his hair, his body shifting in a state of realization.

"Oh, wow, I remember now. Crap Alice I'm-"

"Don't think about apologizing Cody."

I look out the window, avoiding his eye contact of pleading and confused eyes. It's not my fault he got drunk enough to forget everything at a party. First, off I get he was drunk but it doesn't justify the fact what he did. He had full control he wasn't that drunk, there's no need to apologize. Second, what does he think will happen with this conversation? I'll somehow forgive him?

"What? Alice, I'm trying to fix things here."

I sigh, looking out the window as little droplets of rain roll down the window.

"Apologizing won't fix anything. I'm not sure what will fix this."

I have no clue what will fix this mess of hatred we made for each other. It sure as hell won't be fixed with an apology that's for sure. There has to be more, I can't let him in that easily. We've caused so much hurt to each other in different ways and there's no way you can fix open scares so soon.