Um Just Stuff In My Mind

demons are just fallen angels

When I was a child I never belived in demons but now I'm starting to change my mind because of what lies before my charcoal colored eyes.
In stories demons are said to be ugly and disgusting with horns, sharp teeth and black sometimes skeletal ashy wings. But the creature I see is neither ugly nor disgusting .
It or I gess I should say he has small bearly  noticeable black horns silky black hair piercing red eyes and gorgeous black feathery wings if anything he looks like an angel touched by darkness .
Then he spoke as if knowing my unspoken question "remember Satan was once gods favorite angel looks will always be deciveing , and don't forget me I'll see you soon dear now wake up." With that I questioned what he ment but he just dispersed into a cloud of darkness and I wandered my home searching for traces but soon found myself blacking out for no reason. I closed my eyes for a minute to help calm my nerves but when I opened them I was in my bed starting up at my celing in a cold sweat.
I Roled on my side and looked an my digital clock it was 4:56 am. Deciding it was too early I just went back to bed in hopes of another hours rest. As I lay there I trace the scars that lay upon my wrists and wish for a hero to save me from myself because I can't pray for God's help because I know Damm well he ain't gunna help me if he was then where was he when my father killed my mother when I was 14 then tryed killing me before I accidentally killed him in self defense and anger from him killing mother that's the day I stopped believing in god I was put in a foster home and was abused I ran away at 16 and lived on the streets till 17 then met my boyfriend of 2 years he helped me get on my feet again and get a job then on our 2nd anivercery I caught him fucking my best friend and I fell into a depression and soon started having these strange dreams at first it was just talking or murmurs but now there's this human with monster like fetures that says wakes my up by saying the same thing every night

"don't forget me I'll see you soon dear now wake up"
I'm slowly growing used to it but I just wish I knew what it meant