Eye of the Storm (Swaragini FF)

Chapter 8

Swara had been happy today, for more reasons that one. It has been 2 days since her conversation with Ragini. She couldn't claim there was any change in Ragini's behavior towards her – not that she expected any, and if there had been any, she wasn't trying to read too much into it this early in the day. No, what had been different was that she had calmed down the final turbulent thought floating in her mind – the one involving Laksh.

They had met again today. This time she had been the one who had driven the flow of their conversation.

"How long we going to do this Laksh?" she had asked him straight off. He had just stared at her, not having any answer to it. For once, she felt that he was coming to the same conclusion as she was. For once, she felt that he was finally seeing the situation for what it was, and that had been the reason why she had felt comfortable taking charge of the conversation.

Laksh rubbed his eyes and looked her straight in the eye for the first time in few days "I have been thinking about this for the past few days and as much as I didn't want to admit it, my heart is not in this anymore. I have come to admit that while we had a good friendship, but our relationship beyond that was never really what we perceived it to be"

Encouraged by his words, she had pressed on "Laksh, let us finally put the past to rest. It will not yield us anything but mirages which wont ever be true".

He had nodded "Was it Sanskar?" he asked

"No, Sanskar never come between us. You and I came in between us" she answered truthfully. He nodded. They had been the reason for their own debacle. Their perception of what love was, their lack of trust and to some extent, their lack of connect - to who the other person really was - for them to really love and accept each other with all the good and the bad.

While Sanskar had never come between them and wasn't the reason for their separation, in the true sense, it has been Sanskar who had helped her understand what love really was and how what she had with Laksh just didn't measure up to it. She had been in her room, the previous night, introspecting. She had finally calmed down the winds in her mind enough to finally hear her own heart. The fact that Sanskar was the only name running in her sub-conscious wasn't surprising, he was after all the voice of her conscience. What had been surprising though, was the magnitude and multitude of emotions she felt for him- the longing that was almost physically painful, the warmth that she felt when she remembered his smile, the heat that she felt rushing to her cheeks when she thought about his rare but gentle touch, the soothing feeling that washed over her at the sound of his voice, the tingling sensation that was coming alive in her stomach at the thought of talking to him the next day.

She had been restless that entire night. She could have ignored the voice in her heart, she was after all not the most perceptive when understanding her own heart and its desires as she was when it came to others, but what sealed it for her, was that in her restlessness she had wandered off the the guestroom. She had tried to touch every place they sat together to chat, every place that Sanskar touched during the course of his stay there – as a way of being closer to him. It hadn't stopped there, she had finally fallen asleep in his bed, cocooned by his lingering fragrance that was still present in the sheets on the bed. It has been the best sleep she ever had. When she woke up, early enough to not make anyone aware of her escapade, she had also woken up to the reality that she had fallen completely and irrevocably in love with Sanskar.

She wasn't sure how long had she felt this way or when the feelings of friendship changed into something more, just that they had. She wondered, not for the first time since her realization, if destiny had been trying to give her signals of their impeding bond long before, in its own way, by separating her from Laksh and binding her more and more with Sanskar at each turn of their relationship. If there had been greater powers at play here, she was thankful to them from bringing Sanskar in her life and more importantly, for waking her up to what was in her heart.

She knew she wouldn't be able to talk to Sanskar tonight. He would be away at a business party, which she knew he would have avoided if it were possible, favoring to talk to her instead. While she missed him greatly and would have wanted to talk to him, her realization had strangely given her some patience – they would after all have their entire life time with each other now. She would make sure they made up for this time.

She remembered the call she had with Sanskar earlier that very day when he woke up. There had been a softness in her voice that neither she nor Sanskar had missed. He had of course mistaken it for her being tired – after all she had always been a bit chirpy with him. She had assured him that she was fine, though she hadn't delved much into it. Even now, she had a blush on her cheeks thinking about Sanskar.

A knock on the door brought her out of her reverie. She opened the door to find Badi Maa standing there.

"Swara come with me" Annapurna said before making her way down the stairs.

Swara followed her quietly with dread building up in the pit of her stomach. Annapurna stopped in front of the temple

"Swara, do you remember the discussion we had here, in front of the temple, a few weeks back?" she asked