4 | probability

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4 :: Probability

Edan Mathews was right, she'd know when it's time. Madeline didn't have to second guess that something was wrong when she woke up the second time that day early morning and found Edan missing from their bed which they had shared only a few hours ago. It wasn't a peaceful emptiness next to her, in fact it was fearsome and didn't give a good feeling at all.

Many a times it's our instincts or our sixth sense which give us answers or sort of indication of things that are going to happen. Things that we hope don't happen. Madeline was getting that sort of feeling.

She quickly got up and looked around for Edan but only in vain. She paused and sighed and thought about the possible places he could be right now, instantly she went to the cliff.

Over the days the cliff had happened to become a sort of safe haven for both Madeline and Edan. They'd always be there if they couldn't take anymore of sanity amidst the people. They would come here and find it to be the most peaceful spot for just sitting and thinking and breathing.

Today however, as she went towards the sacred place Madeline did not find the same quietness that she did every time, in fact, she found a hustle and bustle of people whispering and murmuring along with a few men drenched in water speaking in hushed voices with a few officers. Officers.

The fact that Madeline's sixth sense never failed her was proven again as she took in the view in front of her. Something was wrong and she couldn't find Edan among the ones standing.

"Hey!" She called out to someone passing by hurriedly.

"Yeah?" The answer was merely a whisper, probably because of his taxed up state. He was one of the drenched guys and was shivering with the cold water.

"Do you know what's happening?" She asked.

"Someone jumped from the cliff." He said and nodded and went away leaving Madeline despondent. Her heart was beating loudly and the absence of Edan installed fear in her heart and mind. The fear was something she was well aware of, it was normal and something we are all accustomed to.

You know that feeling you get when your father is late from work, that feeling you get while waiting for him back home, worried, just hoping nothing went wrong. Or that feeling you get when your friend is boarding a train and you irrationally fret about the possibilities of an accident of the train. That feeling when you know that the odds of it happening are only one in a million but what if, what if, it's the time of that one possibility. That is the sprouting fear of anticipation and wait that Madeline was feeling.

The chances that Edan would have jumped to end it all were minimal, because he was happy and happy people didn't do all this, did they? But then again, there was this probability too, that he wasn't happy. Madeline felt dizzy and suddenly things took place in a blur.

She didn't realise when Hazel had come and stood besides her, a despondent look sketched all over her face with touch ups of worry. She looked distraught and she looked scared and she looked almost given up as she took her friend by hand and led her to the body that had been brought up from the waters.

Hazel was aware that the time which would follow was going to be terribly hard on her bestfriend and while she didn't have the heart to lead her to Edan Mathews' dead and soaked body, she had to do it. Because while she couldn't hide her bestfriend from reality, which was something she was bound to face, she could stand by her side and help her stay put and strong while she would think of ending it all.

Because she knew that this is what Madeline would want and because she was sure this would happen.

And she was right.

Madeline Joseph couldn't even bear to look at the dead body of the man she had just spent some of the best moments of her life with. She couldn't bear to look at the soaked and shrivelled, pale body of the person who was giving her life to breathe in the short time that they had met.

Madeleine Joseph couldn't stand it.

So she did one thing that she could do, she turned away and walked back to the room Edan and her had last been with together and she days at down hopeless until her eyes fell on the notebook he had given her.

It was time.

Maybe Edan Mathews wasn't as happy as it seemed, maybe people had mastered the art of truly faking it after all. Maybe, she failed to truly read him. Maybe she failed to understand the true emotions in their times together. Maybe she failed to understand that Edan Mathews was dead way before today, maybe, because she knew that now in her hands were the broken poetry of his broken soul.

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