Dallen's Sweet Karma

Karma #23.5: Letter

Chapter 23

Dallen,

I don't know how to start this letter. I wrote this letter because I don't have enough courage to say everything in front of you. Dallen, I want you to know that I love you. I really do and no one can change that. The first time I met you, I know that I cannot reach you nor even talk to you but the world was to small for us. I remember how you tried to use me to get Bien away from Mia. Funny, how immature and irrational our minds that time. I am a notorious womanizer, I don't specificaly like girls except for sex. I am bad same as you. You want everything, you get everything. Hindi ka papayag na hindi mo makukuha ang gusto mo. But we learned, we changed.

Nagtataka ako ng mga panahon na sa halip na si Mia ang inaalala ko, mas ikaw ang inaasikaso ko. I didn't realize that I came to like you. Gusto na kita kahit spoiled brat ka. Gusto na kita dati pa. And when you leave to go to France, I tried to pushed away my feeling. Wala akong panlaban sayo. You're known, popular and a star samatalang ako, a student.

But when I met you again at Vegas, I am instantly sure that it was you who was drunk beside me. I tried to ignore you but you were such a troublemaker. Parang kailangan nalang kitang laging protektahan. You were always in danger. At sa pagliligtas ko sayo dun sa manyak na kano na yun, hindi ko akalaing mapapalapit ako sayo. I truly enjoy that night. The party, the dancing, the stripers and all.

And when I finally sobber the next morning... I found out that we are married and you run away.

Funny to say that I didn't freak out that I am married, rather, I feak out when I don't know where to find you.

Hinanap kita and when I finally met you, I didn't regret marrying you. Ang tanong nga lang, anong magiging reaksyon mo? And sure you want a divorce. Napansin mo ba kung pano ako nag reason out? Ngayon ko lang narealize na kaya ko maraming excuse noon kasi talagang ayoko makipag divorce.

About the first time, uhm, I thought we've done it back then at the hotel pero hindi pala. I regret doing that to you not because that I don't want you but because I took you v card. Nakwento ko na naman ata sayo yun. But I haven't told you that I know that I can impregnant you that time, binaliwala ko nga lang. Lalo na ng naging madalas ang pagkikita natin. I forgot everything, and alam ko lang I am happy when I am with you. Until, I realized that I am falling for you. That time, I am determine not to continue the divorce. I want you. I need you.

Alam ko selfish ako. Pinilit kong maibalik ka sa akin. I succeed. Nalaman ko rin na mahal mo ako at yun lang ang mahalaga sa akin. Pero mali ako. Maling mali. I forgot about the consiquences that I need to face. You had a miscarriage before we even knew that you are pregnant. May kasalanan din ako sa nangayari. Hindi kita inalala at kahit na parang okay na ang lahat hindi ko inisip ang sasabihin ng iba. You may not care about them but I don't want your name to be in vain.

I am sorry Dallen for not being the man who you should be proud of. I am younger than you, not richer than you, not as popular as you and not even have his own money to provide for you. I am sorry I am not worthy for you.

I am leaving you Dallen. It's for our own good.

But I will be back. Babalik ako Dallen, I promise. And when Get back, I am not a weakling. I can be your man. I can give you what you want. I can be the guy you will be proud of to call husband. I will marry you again Dallen. It will take long, but can you wait for me? I am hoping but if you find another man I am willing to accept my loss. But I want you to remember, ikaw lang talaga ang mahal ko Dallen.

Max

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Okay, ewan ko kung maganda ba yang letter na nagawa ko. 3am na ng madaling araw at may exam pa ako bukas. Good luck sa akin bukas.

Anyway, the last chapter will be post by next week (I guess). Nakakaramdam na naman kasi ako ng kalungkutan sa pagtatapos ng DSK kaya baka matagalan kasi tatamarin akong itype. Ngayon pa lang mamimiss ko na si Dallen at Max. SIGE NA, tama na drama ko. Comments and votes are highly appreciated. Love you guys!

Keired