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;emily;

I sighed, opening the door to my bedroom and tossing my bag to the side. The faint laughs of the boys could be heard from up hear, but that wasn't what was bothering me.

I have therapy today.

It's my first day, and I'm definitely not looking forward to it. It ruined my entire week of school this week. The appointment was made for Friday afternoon at four. That's a mere hour away. I wish I could skip.

The place it's held in is pretty close too. We haven't discussed how often I'll be going, but I'd like to go never.

I'm kind of a giant downer about this but I've always hated therapy. I was forced to do it as a child and that wasn't any fun, but I thought I'd never have to do it again. Boy, was I so wrong. So very, very, wrong.

I came home an hour late because I was with my friends, but I made an excuse to leave.
I would tell them about therapy, but I'm not sure if I want them knowing a bunch if things, and I don't want to tell them a huge lie about it. It's best not to tell them I guess. It's easiest too.

I collapse onto my bed, groaning when the second I do my bedroom door opens.

"What is it now?" I demand, flopping over to face them as I sit up. They couldn't have just spoken to me when I was downstairs?

"We um- why are you home so late?" Luke asks awkwardly. It was only an hour.

"I was with my friends." I furrow my eyebrows. Where else would I be? Sitting alone on the rock smoking until I actually kill myself?  That would take a while, and a lot of cigarettes, I'd rather not.

"Oh," Ashton says quietly with a nod. What does that mean?

I raise my eyebrows at them, waiting for someone to explain. Michael opens and closes his mouth, giving up. "They just- you should really stay away from them. They aren't the, um, they aren't the best people." Calum eventually speaks. That's rather rude. I already know my friends don't like them, maybe that's why they don't want me to.

"They're nice people, you guys just don't like them." I huff with a small roll of my eyes.  They go to speak again but I cut them off. "Even if I did stop talking to them, who would I talk to? I don't know anybody else. I get along with them, they've done nothing wrong since I've been here."

My friends have been great since I met them. They immediately accepted me into their group on my first day here, what could be so bad?

"You could talk to us, sit with us at lunch." Michael suggest, the other three boys nodding. I'm not going to sit with my foster brother and his friends and hang out with them all the time.

"First of all, no. Second of all, no. And third of all, Luke, you were pissed when I hung out with them for a few hours." I point out.

He shrugs at me. "It's different now. I was just being an ass before."

I shake my head, going downstairs. They follow me down, but that's expected. They weren't going to just stay in my room awkwardly. Pulling the sleeves of my grey sweatshirt up, I wash my hands.

I was out in the woods, they're coated in a layer of dirt and it's gross.

Afterwards, I reach into the fridge and grab some strawberries and just snack on them. Calum smiles at me.

I'm just eating some strawberries, he treats it like some ginormous accomplishment and I hate that. It makes me feel like a little kid. I hate being congratulated and told I did a good job or something on simple things humans do daily. It makes me feel degraded and like I'm lesser. Frankly, it's embarrassing.

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