Chocolate ♕ Ginny Weasley

nineteen

Chapter Nineteen;

Patricia yelled and threw her Herbology textbook away from her, where it went skidding across the grassy ground. Her head swam – she couldn't think, take in any words, understand anything. The letters scrambled together on the page, forming an alien language. Her breathing was rapid and she groaned, pulling her knees to her chest and burying her head in them.

At once, Ginny's head snapped up from her textbook, where she'd been copying a diagram. "Cia, oh no, not again," she exclaimed, voice shaky. Without second thought she scrambled to Patricia's side and took both her hands. "Cia. Cia. Patricia. Calm down, Cia."

Sometimes, Patricia didn't know where the time had gone. O.W.L. exams were only a month away, and the overwhelming fear had suddenly devoured her like a ravenous monster.

Time had been her enemy. Ever since Christmas break, her nerves had grown worse and worse until she was running only on coffee and Ginny's soft words of comfort. The bags under her eyes that had been forming since before Slughorn's party were suddenly like charcoal, and her skin was pale. She was prone to panic attacks just looking at a textbook or hearing the teachers mention the date of the exams.

For so long, Patricia had been held to the highest of standards, by her parents, and by herself. She'd been achieving top grades since her first year at Hogwarts, and now she felt the expectation of her teachers that she'd achieve good grades in their exams. The owl she received from her parents every day, reminding her of the importance of the exams and insisting she spend more and more time studying didn't help.

There were days when all the pressure dropped like the weight of the world on her shoulders and she felt as though she was going to collapse because of the weight of it. There were days when all she wanted to do was scream.

And the entire time, Ginny had been a pillar of strength by her side.

When Patricia started to seize up walking inside the library – a place she had once associated with comfort and relaxation – Ginny had been the one to put her foot down and forbid Patricia from going inside. She'd suggested studying outside, where they could be out of sight of anyone else but themselves. They'd found a hidden area and that's where they studied, where the air was fresh and the area was open.

When Patricia started to break down in class, or when they were studying, Ginny was instantly by her side and accompanying her to the Hospital Wing to receive a Calming Draught from Madam Pomfrey. And before they did that, she was by Patricia's side, with gentle words and gentle embraces – little acts of comfort and reassurance that sometimes calmed Patricia more than any potion.

That was why, before Ginny took her to Madam Pomfrey, she would do her best to reassure Patricia first.

Patricia shook her head. "I can't do this, Ginny. I – there's no way I'm passing my O.W.L.. There's too much study." She remembered all the spells and wand movements and theory she still had to memorise and cried out, feeling as though she was drowning in information she couldn't understand. "I can't do this. I can't remember all of this. It's not humanly possible!"

"It is," Ginny insisted, her voice gentle. She moved forward, so she was on her knees in front of Patricia. Her thumbs traced small circles on the backs of Patricia's hands. "All my brothers have done it. Thousands of students have done it before you."

"But I can't! Outstanding... It's impossible..." Patricia felt herself begin to shake.

"It is," Ginny repeated breathlessly. "You know why?"

Patricia tried to answer, but she couldn't force the words out of her mouth. Instead she just shook her head while the entire time, her breathing rate continued to increase until her breaths sounded like gasps of wind in her ears.

"Because you're Patricia Bolton," Ginny whispered, and there was such fierce pride in her voice that Patricia blinked, shocked with the force of it. "You can do anything."

"But this -"

"Cia." Ginny cupped Patricia's face in her hands. "I believe in you."

And when Patricia failed to respond, Ginny, in a sudden movement, grabbed the back of Patricia's head and pulled it toward hers, and their lips met in a kiss.

Patricia stiffened as Ginny pressed her lips ever more firmly against her own. She couldn't move. She couldn't understand what was happening. Ginny, was kissing her. Ginny... Ginny's lips were on her own. She was frozen, rooted to the ground. She wasn't breathing which in turn was causing her heart and breathing to return to normal – though, it was racing again, for an entirely different reason.

Ginny. Her dream was happening. Her dream was now reality. 

She was kissing Ginny Weasley and nothing else mattered.

Patricia closed her eyes and began to melt into the kiss, but at the moment Ginny broke away. Disappointment flickered through Patricia's heart and her eyes widened. Her hand lifted and she gingerly touched her lips. They felt different, somehow.

Her eyes were locked on Ginny's brown ones. Neither of them were moving. Ginny's face was impassive, unreadable.

"What -" Patricia breathed, but then Ginny closed her eyes and pushed herself to her feet and was hurrying away.

Patricia sucked in a breath, hurt puncturing her heart. "Ginny!" Her voice was strangled, and came out as a mere croak. She clambered clumsily to her feet, dirt smearing her hands. "Wait!"

Ginny paused and slowly turned around as Patricia ran up to her as fast as her legs would carry her. They stood in front of each other, barely any distance between them that Patricia could feel Ginny's laboured breaths on her face.

Patricia inhaled heavily, catching her breath. Slowly, she looked up into Ginny's eyes. A sheepish smile crossed her lips.

"Could... could, you do that again?"

Ginny's eyes widened. Realisation dawned on her. "You -"

Patricia nodded. She felt like she was moving in some sort of dream state or trance. "Since third year," she breathed.

Ginny opened and closed her mouth, soundlessly forming words. Her eyes were sparkling – Patricia thought she caught a glimpse of tears.

"You should've said something," Ginny whispered.

Patricia felt her breath hitch in her throat.

"Why?"

"Because." Ginny stepped closer to Patricia, so there was no distance between them. Patricia sucked in a breath as their bodies touched. "Everything would have been different."

And with that, Ginny pressed her lips firmly to Patricia's own and this time, there was no shock to recover from, no stress to get over. Patricia closed her eyes and her arms snaked around Ginny's neck and in they kissed until they forgot everything else but each other.

Patricia's heart was bursting with joy, pure bliss singing through her veins. She thought she might as well have been walking in heaven.

Because - Patricia laughed ruefully how cliche it sounded - that moment was heavenly.