prism [ kim s.j ] ( fin )

† 50

     soo kyu's trinkets cram around the huge box, seokjin's fingers gliding around the plastic jewels thinking her tiny ones would years ago.

     this box held her. held soo kyu. it even had that smell of coconut that he likes — he would think of a vacation, just two, with hammocks and fine sand and pristine waters and the sun glaring at the view through the palm leaves that this is not their reality.

     not real. this is not real. they were never real, he remembered. were they? maybe.

     empty prescription bottles, loopy chicken scratches of dosages and measurements, an ultrasound picture. it had elegant writing at the back of the old photo, hazed with faded white splotches. tears? maybe it smudged the ink, it wasn't dry enough.

our angel, she's so cute

seven months

     underneath of the box, wrapping a scarf and a blanket around him ( it smelt like rain and wood, some hint of coconut too ), he saw a crinkled paper. stuck on pictures. a collage.

'my family.'

     the father's smile looks familiar, unwavering similar to his daughter's. the mother, however, a twin of the girl with her eyes and nose and her aura. they were young on one side.

     mr joon had little soo kyu perched on his broad shoulders, noticing his face so similar to the mother's — must be siblings — and how carefree they seem. so rare he gets to see a happy collage. happy pictures.

     seokjin flipped to the back, more dried splotches and ink. he recognised mr joon's writing and a picture of him. he was smiling, blanket up to his chin.

joon hyeri

mother , sister

died 15.01.93

giving birth to soo kyu

park seung ki

father , brother-in-law

died 18.02.94

stage iv esophageal cancer

     there was a new section in different writing. a different person.

joon jaeyeol

uncle , joon hyeri's brother

died 23.12.11

sleeping in bed. he was having a good dream ( picture )

     this one was the worst to read. his tears were soaked with the past sorrows and uncontrollable sniffles.

park soo kyu

daughter , niece , last one of the family

died everyday

near death from stage iv esophageal cancer

death due to loss of loved ones and regretful decisions