The Bad Boy and His Good Side (Shawn Mendes AU)

Chapter 57

*Several years later*

Today was the day, quite possibly the happiest of my life: my wedding day. I had proposed to Vivian in a moonlit dinner after I got back from a tour.

I'd gotten a record deal shortly before the end of high school: one Saturday, on a street corner, I stood playing my guitar and trying to earn some money to buy something for Vivian's birthday. A man in his mid thirties approached me to compliment me, after explaining that he worked for a record label he handed me a card with his number on it. Months later, I found myself in a studio, living out my dream with the best girl I could ever ask for, by my side. I never ended up spending the money I made that day, it sat in my sock drawer until a few months ago when I bought the ring for her, giving it to her on our anniversary even though that date often seemed cloudy. I suppose that perhaps we were young, only twenty four years old, but we'd been together for eight.

I stood at the alter, drowning in anticipation to see how flawless she would look. She looked flawless normally, but something told me she be radiant. My eyes kept watering, but every time Cameron snickered I convinced him it was the pollen since my mother and Vivian insisted the reception be outdoors. I gazed around, the crowd wasn't very large. On Vivian's side, sat Aaron and Matt/her own immediate families. On mine, my family and some family friends I vaguely remembered from my childhood.

"She looks amazing." I heard Cameron whisper, Aaron and Matt were walking my glowing bride down the isle of daisy petals. The small crowd all turned their heads in unison.

"She does." I could feel my jaw plummet. Her eyes locked with mine, I'd never seen them sparkle like today. The dress reached her ankles and the pale blue fabric made her look so magnificent that I needed to lean against Cameron for support. Rather than a traditional veil, she has a beautiful chain of lilies circling her head with a fistful of wild flowers as her bouquet. My chest felt strange, like it'd been filled with liquid yet I could still breathe. It felt the same as the first time she—when sober—kissed me: more than just a spark, but a whole fire ignited inside my chest, swelling me with pleasant warmth. I'd never seen anything so lovely as her as she came to face me.

There was a moment, when we stood, inhaling each other. My mind ventured to one raining night when we got left home alone and said we'd watch movies in my den. We were eighteen and we both knew we loved each other. We kissed passionately, and she ran her nails down my back while I whispered how I loved her. I came back to reality, I opened my eyes to her hands in mine. Her voice then filled my ears, she called me gold and promised her loyalty. "

Bound in a gold chain made from the same material you are." She said, smiling. "Happiness, trust..." As she went on my heart swelled in my chest and beat so hard it could smash apart my ribs. "I could feel my heart swell in my chest when I looked at him, when I heard his voice, when someone asks about him, when I think about him. I wonder how long until I can feel him. Hear his laugh for real, to have my hand in his, to see his smile, when he's away. The thoughts of him, and photos if him; they make me feel real. I need to touch him, he's so fantastic it feels that's all he can be. Fantasy. I know he's real, but, in my head he's waiting for me on my favourite beach and sitting under the bleeding sun. He's waiting to hold me and tell me it's all okay, because with him it always will be. 

He makes life better than okay. Because of him, I think about things no one made me imagine before. As well as feel things I didn't know I could feel. I never even knew I could ever crave some one so much, and have things like the movies I think are so unrealistically stupid. I never even thought it was possible for someone to make you believe in what you once laughed at. In the moment I saw him, I forgot half my sworn morals and let my heart slam hard enough to make me trip. Trip, then fall so deeply in love with just his eyes. His voice. I've fallen so far that I can't get out, no matter how hard I try, not that I'd want to ever.

I've never been so afraid to lose someone, no one has ever made my world so stable. Or at all for that matter. Nor, has anyone seemed know what I'm thinking before I even inhale to say it.

The thought of him, is simply enough to save me from the tsunamis that the earthquakes in my head triggers. He, himself is much more powerful than I thought a human could be. He gave me something real, for the rest of my seconds he's all I want. He saved me like the those people I put upon pedestals, the only thing that keeps him from being among them is the way he knows my soul.

I will always do my best to be the same for him." She finished her vows and she was crying, but there were tears down my face too. So it didn't matter, especially sense I heard my parents weeping happily.

Now came the nerve racking part: my turn. I've performed sold out shows with ease, yet stifling out my vows, horrified me. "Everything," I stopped and squeezed my eyes shut only to meet her's when I opened them, "Everything was like how I thought your life must've been when I first saw you: gold and that includes you. For years I watched you, and it broke my heart to see your smile fade. I didn't understand why or why I couldn't get over you. Then when we we're juniors in high school, I found you in the middle of breaking down, you probably don't remember that day very clearly but I do. I remember it because it was the first time I realized I loved you. I can remember the following days extremely clear because you finally let me in." I stopped again a brushed a tear from her cheek. "You needed someone on one of those nights and it happened to be me that came to your rescue. I was so excited about being your hero that I wouldn't let you kiss me because I knew you'd regret it in the morning. You're touch didn't feel real, but you were. The first time you felt real was the morning when you were, safe, in my truck and I kissed you. You didn't resist, at all, I think because you were safe and I noticed that when you were afraid it just felt wrong. So I promise that I'll make sure you always feel real and that it never feels wrong."

Jack J smirked at us, he became registered as an ordained minister sense Vivian preferred someone close to us to "pronounce us husband and wife." I thought there wouldn't be a better person to do it than the one that kept her safe for me, years ago. He agreed especially because they'd grown really close over the years. He began to let our vows precede the usual promises.

"I love you." She whispered.

"I love you too." My lips followed.

He granted me  that sweet release into being bound to her. I wrapped my arm around her waist and spin so I'm dipping her like in old movies. I couldn't have asked for anything better, even if I could've, better didn't exist when you marry your best friend.

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So I'm thinking this will be the last chapter and I might be posting an epilogue once I get about ten votes on this chapter. I'm sorry if this was crappy, I had the chapter finished a few days ago but my wifi crashed and I lost it. If Vivian's vows sounded like second person or a birds eye view basically, they were originally a poem I wrote about my ex. This took me awhile to right because had somethings I was going through, anyways love y'all.