Part Six

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Day forty-four: It gets better.

Today I felt better.

I was finally accepting whatever was this love triangle is about, and I decided I don't want to be a part of it anymore. Lately I gained back a lot of friends, friends I lost when I was with him. I found out his ex-girlfriend doesn't want him back after all because he was too much of a douche to her, and to be honest I'm happy for her, she did the right choice because it's obvious she's too good for him. He didn't speak to me since the last time, and neither did I; I don't want nor need to ever have another conversation with him again. I seriously hope I'll never have to talk to him or see his face ever again. I deactivated my social media, the one place where I would express my thoughts the most, simply because I didn't want to keep checking his profiles nor did I want to write my thoughts there anymore, I'd rather keep things to myself and remain as far away from this dramatic world as possible.

Everything was getting better, finally.

I was now over this control he had over me, and I allowed myself to rebuild new friendships with guys, finally able to have a proper conversation with a male without feeling paranoid or watched. I'm aware I've been used and lied to, I also know that the things I've given him are things I can't have back, but I also know I need to erase any memory with him and move on. I hope that with time, he will be nothing but old news and that eventually, a greater guy will come along and I will not worry about him or anything that includes our previous relationship. I gave him what I thought he deserved, but I was wrong, time to let it go. I'm happy, I'm going out from time to time, I got time for myself and my friends again and this is enough to make me the happiest and enough for me to be thankful for this beautiful life I have.

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