Depression With Crimson

Paint The Walls White

Allen awoke in a small white room. He could hear the sounds of machines, a loud pitch beep that was the heart monitor he was hocked up to. It didn't take long to find out where he was.

He tried to sit up, but his entire body was numb. A long sigh left his lips, as he stared up at the ceiling. "Great... I'm alive." He muttered under his breathe. It  wasn't long before the doctor came in. "Oh your awake." He said and started his way over towards the white haired teen. "You lost a lot of blood, so you may not be able to move for a while. Your lucky your friends found you before it was too late." 'Friends, what friends do I have?' He lost himself in depression and thought before the doctor snapped his fingers, bringing him back to reality.

The doctor smiled at him, which made Allen wonder how much he knew."Your Allen Walker, right?" The doctor asked and Allen nodded. The doctor scribbled down something on his clip board and smiled at him again. "Where are my manners. I am Komui Lee. I believe you know my sister, Lenalee Lee." 'Great! Her! So not only did she steal my boyfriend, but now I get her psychotic brother as my doctor. Might as well pull the plung.'

Allen adverted his eyes and landed on his arm full of those thick lines in his arms and the 'Kill Me' now looking bolder than the other night. "I can see you want sometime alone so I'll leave you too it. There is a button on the side of the bed that will alert me if you need something." Komui said, but got no reaction so he just left the room.

Finally Allen was alone, and was slightly happy. He wished they didn't rescue him... Wait... Who rescued him in the first place. His question soon got answered when his two friends and his ex lover came in. Lenalee took Allen's hand and started to tear up. "Allen-Kun..." She sniffles, trying to get Allen's attention, but Allen decided he didn't want to deal with them.

All emotion was lost from his silver eyes, making them look dull. "Allen... Kun... Are you okay?" She asked again but got no answer. Tear ran down her face as she held Allen's pale hand tighter.

Kanda stood back against the wall watching it all. He felt guilty for what happened, knowing it was his fault Allen was like this, but being him, he hid it deep inside him.

"Allen-Kun? Please, say something?" Once again the white haired teen didn't make a sound. Lenalee released his grip on his hand and fell back crying into her hands.

Deep inside Allen he hurts, but it was like nothing else existed. He didn't die physically, but he killed himself mentally. If if were up to him he would have died all together.

His red haired friend put a hand on the weeping teen's shoulder. "Lenalee, he needs his space. You can't force him to respond, that would only make it worse.

Allen wanted nothing more to just die right there. Slit his throat, slit his vain on his wrist, or sufficate, but there was nothing he could harm himself with.
Well... he supposes it's all his fault for not being strong enough to live in this cruel world. The life he tried to live in gray turned out more black than anything. Now he is just a pathetic mess, bleeding his way out from black too red. The only thing he had in his mind was how he wish his world will end, like everything around him has already.

Lenalee does not know the truth, but you think your best friend in the whole wide world would take a hint that the guy you've been sleeping around with, was the guy he liked since high school. Some friends he got. His high school crush finally admitted he like him, and they have been going out for 6 months now. Think that could be anymore obvious. Apparently not.

So not only did it hurt to be back stabbed by his best friend, but he was cheated on with his boyfriend. All he can think about now is ending his worthless life once and for all. Like it should have been that day. That day when... When he...

Flashback

It was a little after 3pm and he had an hour and a half before he had to leave for work. What better way to spend your time than with your best friend. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but if he just would have listened to himself, he never would have been suicidal.

He already had depression, but he tried his best not to make other's aware of it. Not even Lenalee knows, which she would have if she read the fine print.

At last Allen was at the front door of his best friends house. Not hearing the noises. Not hearing his friend call out his boyfriends name. He opened the door and there he stood, frozen in shock.

It took them a while before they noticed him there. By them his mind was screaming at him.

'Run!'

"A-Allen, W-What are you doing here?"

'Now!'

"Moyashi?"

'Don't look back. Keep moving forward'

With that he ran fast and father than he even has in his whole entire life. Although that didn't matter to him anymore. His heart broke into a thousand pieces never to be put back together. What did he have to live for. Everything is gone. Everything.

Thankfully there is only one friend who can comfort him at a time like this. He reached into his pocket and grabbed his trusty switch knife.

Hello dear friend.
Let us be together forever.

End of flashback

Allen showed no sighs of approval while the three were there. He stared off into space, lost in his mind, a better place than where he was anyway.

Finally everyone got tired of no response, and like everyone in Allen's world; they all left him to agonize by himself.

Allen had no problems with it. In fact, he loved being alone.

But

Before everyone left, a certain red haired male sat down next to the bed. Lavi has done nothing wrong to him, although his trust is like a thin layered glass. Sadly it shattered everywhere leaving nothing to scavenge through.

Lavi leaned closer to Allen to make sure no one listening would hear. "Yu-chan's stupid for treating you like that. I wouldn't blame you for ending up like this. I know I could get in trouble for this, but I have something you might need. It will help you forget all your troubles." And with that Lavi fished through his pockets pulling out Allen's switch knife Allen used, and was found with.

"You see Allen. I was there; I watched you open that door and run away with the saddest expression I have ever seen on you. I ran after you, wanting to help. I'm sorry Allen. I probably should have let you die... But I wanted you to know, that if you do find the strength to live.
You won't be alone.
I will stay with you,
And we can live in this horrible planet.
Together."

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I'm such an emotion wreak. Welp first Laven story on my page. You should really comment on which pairing you want cause right now, I just could keep torturing poor Allen-Kun because my life has no meaning. But I won't because I love Allen too much. Anyway,
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If I get at least ten votes or comments I will create an Ask Allen Walker for any unsolved (or perverted) questions you have.
Love you all!
See you next chapter.