Overcoming The Odds [MxM]

Chapter 2: Fading Away

^ Garrett ^

Garrett

Her scent flooded my nostrils, sending a pleasant chill down my spine. Rasberries and cream. The sweet, gentle scent matches my mate's sweet, gentle disposition to a T. It doesn't make sense how I could make such an assumption, not knowing her and all, but deep down, I know it's true. I can feel it in the marrow of her bones. As I hold her in my arms I can't get over just how well she fits in my hold- like a puzzle piece.

She's small too, I noticed. My muscular frame practically engulfs hers' as I hold her close, her head tucked under my chin. So fragile, it feels like she would break as easily as glass. My protectiveness of her skyrockets to new highs, and I can't held but pull her closer, her body melding into mine. My eyes flutter shut as I bury my face in her hair. I couldn't believe it, having her in my arms after all these years of waiting.

My legs buckled, nearly giving out as the relief hit me. Knowing that after all these years of hoping and praying for a mate, that I didn't have to pray anymore was just indescribable. . . "I love you so much," I whispered, afraid that if I spoke any louder the moment would be lost forever, "I'm never going to let you go."

"You already have." Came my mate's soft reply. What? I opened my eyes, and found that my mate was no longer in my arms. Where did she go!? I looked around frantically and saw her, standing just out of reach and hidden in the shadows. I took a step forward and fell to my knees, the strength suddenly sapped from my limbs. I tried to crawl to her, but found that my legs were stuck in place. What's happening?

She's leaving.

The thought came suddenly, and a noose clenched around my throat, choking me. I didn't want to believe it, but I knew it was true. My eyes stung as tears started to well in them. I just wanted to see her face, just one glimpse before she left. Looking up from my useless legs and gasped at the sight before me. Her whole body appeared transparent, the only thing left was a vague apparition of what was once there. Like she was nothing more than a mirage waning in the summer's heat. Her features were distorted and blurred, faded to the point where I couldn't even tell what she was wearing let alone what she looked like.

"No, no. No, don't go!" I pleaded, struggling against the impossible weight pressing down on me. Trying to stand. I reached out for her, but she was too far away. All I could do was watch as she faded away. Then, she was gone. Leaving me with nothing but the darkness. I shouted, tugging at fistfulls of my own hair. I had her! She was in my arms, and then she . . she just disappeared. "Why goddess?" I groaned out, "Why dangle hope infront of me only to rip it away?"

The pain was building rapidly, like a snowball rolling down a snowy hill, before crashing into my heart. Nearly knocking it from my chest. "No!" I yelled, shooting up and into a sitting position. I quickly scanned the room, looking for my mate then the cold, hard reality hit me. It was only a dream.

The same one that has been tormenting me all month now, driving me to the limits. My eyes automatically came to rest on the empty side of the bed, my hand skimming over the sheets as if trying to prove to myself that she was never here to begin with. The sheets were cold, as they normally are. But I couldn't help but frown in disappointment.

What did you expect? To wake up and find her in bed beside you? I threw my legs over the side of the bed, looking away from the empty side of the bed to the alarm clock on the nightstand. Nine o'clock. It was almost time for patrol duty. My eyes drifted passed the clock to the picture which stood proudly on the nightstand. The picture had always been one of my favorites, it was of me and Melody sitting in the meadow behinf the house. A smile on both of our faces. But now the photo just reminded me of how alone I truly am now.

Melody passed away a few days before the dreams started, when I really needed her. . . Turning away from the photograph I stumbled downstairs and into the kitchen to make breakfast. I poured myself a bowl of fruitloops, that pretty much being all I was motivated to cook today. And the only thing I'm capable of cooking. I literally can't even make toast. The last time I tried the toaster burst into flames. Once I finished my breakfast I put the dirty dishes in the sink before making my way to the front door. As soon as the door opened the chill of the morning air caressed my skin, bringing with it the comforting scent of the forest.

Taking a deep whiff, I let the woodsy scent fill my lungs and wash a sense of relaxation through me.

I almost expected the scent of rasberries and cream to be dancing in the air. The thought made me frown, the relaxing feeling evaporating.

She isn't here, it was just a dream. She was just a dream. I locked those thoughts away in a box and threw away the key before stripping down to my boxers, leaving my clothes just inside the door. I closed the door behind me.

Without my protective layer of clothes, the crisp air had a sharp chill, causing goosebumps to prickle my flesh. I focused, and soon my bones started to snap and reform. The pain made me hiss, but just as quickly as it started it was over. I shook out my deep brown coat and stretched my muscles, growing accustomed to the feeling of standing on four legs instead of two.

It feels so good to be in this form, so free. Like all of life's problems just dissappear, all the chains that bind you are cast off. The feeling of the earth under my paws is so serene. But right now I don't have the time to enjoy nature, I have a job to do. I shoot off into the forest, away from my house and to the Northern border of the pack lands.

Fifteen people are patrol the border, swapping out every twelve hours. Most people only have border patrol duty once a week, three times at most- but I have it every day. I don't mind, hell I asked for more patrol shifts. It just doesn't seem fair to me. I don't have anyone waiting for me at home, no mate, no kids. While other packmembers do. So why should they have to be away from their families?

The answer is they shouldn't. It isn't so bad though, Melody used to occupancy me and help guard the border. Up ahead I could see Valore standing guard under the old oak tree, staring out into the forest. I came to stand by his side and gave him a small nudge, "Your shift's up buddy, now go home to your mate and kids."

Valore turned to me, his eyes a molten silver, swimming with concern. "How have you been holding up?" He asked, I had to hold back the sigh that wanted to burst forth. Packmembers always seem to be asking me that, how are you holding up? or are you doing okay? and my personal favorite it'll be alright. Instead of sighing, or telling him to stop asking that question I simply reply, "I'm going good."

"Every since Melody passed away you seem so. . . distant, maybe you should get another dog." He suggested, making me roll my eyes. Hasn't anyone ever heard of a grieving period? "I'll think about it Valore, thanks for your concern."

"Okay, if you ever need to talk my door is always open." He said, throwing me one last sympathetic look before trotting off. This sucks. I'm the only one in the pack that doesn't have a mate, ever since Orion found his. People used to throw their pity at him since he's the alpha and needs to find his mate and I was perfectly happy with that arrangement, I didn't want anyone's pity. But now that he found his mate their pity and sympathetic words have all been dumped onto me.

It was one of the reasons I moved out of the pack house. The other being I couldn't stand to see mated couples when I was alone, moving away from everyone and isolating myself didn't really make me less alone though. But one day while watching tv, the depressing ASPCA commercial came on, and that's when it hit me- adopt a dog. So the next day I went to the pound and that's where I found Melody. When my eyes met her soft brown ones I knew she was the one for me. She was only a pup when I got her, but soon grew into a strong german shepard. But, my time with her came to an end, and I had to say goodbye.

I buried her behind the house, in the meadow we used to play in. Maybe I should look into getting another dog. Then the nights . . . and days might be a little less lonely.