A quick fix
is what you were.
A solution to the
dark,
endless
rut that I’d been in.
A night of passion,
without reason
and without a thought.
Rushed and frenzied,
rough but
soft,
smooth,
yet calculated.
But afterwards it escalated
and we didn’t know where to go from there.
It was clear
what our hearts desired.
More,
more from me,
more from you,
more from us.
Our brains were what didn’t allow it,
not again.
We could never return,
never,
to where we’d started
those years ago.
Never would we
let ourselves
return.
It wasn’t because
we,
deep down,
didn’t want that,
because
in truth,
I think we did,
and we knew it.
It was because we couldn’t face the hurt,
any more than we could before.
And now,
distance
separated
you
and
me,
like a stone wall.
If not for the little texts,
and the subtle flirting,
we would not exist.
“We” would just be
a word,
and “us” would mean
absolutely nothing,
for we have nothing much to say,
nothing much to relate to
together.
We
are too different.
But my heart
just wishes
that was enough
to get rid of you.
