LEMONADE

Hope

The nail technician pushes my cuticles back, turns my hand over. Stretches the skin on my palm and says, "I see your daughters, and their daughters." That night in a dream the first girl emerges from a slit in my stomach. The scar heals into a smile. The man I love pulls the stitches out with his fingernails. We leave like searchers curling on the side of the bath.

I wake as the second girl crawls up headfirst up my throat, a flower blossoming out of the hole in my face.
•
•
•
Beyoncé
"Mm baby" I moaned letting Nicki kiss my neck probably leaving a mark.

"You want it?" She asked.

"Yes" I whispered.

"What was that? I can't hear you"

"Yes" I said a little bit louder. She moved down some when I heard the doorbell ring followed by banging on the door.

"I know you fucking lying" She groaned.

"I'll get it" I sighed rolling out of bed to answer the door. Whoever was there must not know how this house works, you gotta knock twice to let us know your still living out there. When I finally got to the door I opened it without looking through the peep hole. I gave a confused look to the blank stare I was getting from the person on the other side of the door.

"Umm, what are you doing here?" I asked.

"I came to see you" he smiled pushing the door open so that he could let himself in. He tripped over his own feet walking in. I knew what this means.

"Jay, you're drunk please leave" I tried to get him to move.

"You not happy to see me?" He asked pushing me farther into the house, closing the door behind him.

"No"

"The fuck!?" He yelled slowly walking over to me. This escalated quickly.

"Nicki!" I called for her so she could help me out.

"Oh so you're fucking hoes in my house?!"

"She not a hoe!" I defended. I kept backing up until I hit the wall.

"You know better than to run from me right?" He only says this when he's about to hit me. I haven't heard this sentence in about ten months. I can't lie and say it doesn't scare me.

"Jay please, you promised you wouldn't hit me again" I whispered as hot tears streamed down my face. He stepped closer to me and I could smell the liquor on his breath. My heart rate sped up as I anticipated his next move. Was he going to hit me?

"Onika!" I cried out.

"Seems like your little girlfriend can't save you now"

"Beyoncé?!" She yelled back. She sounded far away from me. Jay narrowed his eyes at me and punched me in my chest. I immediately hunched over struggling to breathe.

"You think it's ok to cheat on me?"

"We aren't...married" I coughed out. He grabbed me up by my hair and I yelped in pain. He wrapped his hands around my throats knocking my head against the wall and choking me.

"We are what I say we are"

"Pl-please s-s-stop" I managed to get out.

"Beyoncé?!" I heard Onika yell again and Jays hands squeeze tighter. More tears ran down my face as I struggled to breathe.

"I...ca-can't...br-breathe" I coughed out. My eyes began to get heavier and heavier as I struggled to keep them open. My feet dangling trying to at least try to kick him off of me. When that didn't work my hands went straight to my neck trying to pry his hands off of me. Nothing was working. He's just stronger than me therefore there was nothing I could do. I hated to say it but I couldn't do anything but let him choke me. As I dipped in and out of consciousness I saw Onika come in and do something to Jay causing him to drop me. I immediately started coughing. I still couldn't breathe.