Afterglow (BWWM)

Chapter 12

I hated this place.

"I know you hate this place," Lindsay said.

I clamped my mouth shut as I entered the University food court overwhelmed by the smell of mystery meat. I gazed at my roommate through narrowed eyes. If she didn't give me some space soon, I was going to lose it.

Since the night I came home "late", she's made it her mission to stick by my side to keep me from "slipping". My right to personal space no longer existed. My clothes, my bag, my room, all of it was fair game and subject to search. I was lucky to use the bathroom without supervision.

This must be what being in prison felt like.

"Why are you doing this to me?" I grumbled.

She zeroed in on me with her crystal, clear baby blues.

"You think I like this? I haven't been able to go out or do anything fun for the past five days. Instead, I'm stuck babysitting your junkie ass and all you've done is complain. You know, you could try to make our time together enjoyable instead of sulking all day."

I crossed my arms.

"I'm sorry, is this made up drug problem ruining your life? What will it take to convince you I'm not getting high? If you'd just believe me, we could go back to business as usual. I go my way and you go yours."

Lindsay whirled on me with her lips pursed.

"Don't do that. Don't make it seem like I'm making a big deal out of nothing when you and I both know you're up to something. I've known you too long not to see the signs. Coming home late at night, looking flushed, being secretive. If you're not smoking, or snorting, or shooting up, or whatever, then what are you doing?"

I assumed that was rhetorical so I didn't answer.

"See, this is what I'm talking about. What are you hiding? I'm hurt you don't trust me enough to tell me the truth," she said.

My frown softened. That wasn't the reason I was keeping quiet. The things Lindsay and I have witnessed these past few years of living together were enough to blackmail each other for a lifetime. I could trust the girl with anything. And as much as she was getting under my skin right now, it didn't take a genius to see that she actually believed I might be in trouble.

The truth was, I was dying to tell her everything. Lord knows I could use someone to talk to about all this. But Lindsay would have questions. And I already had enough of those. So, as hard as it was right now for both of us, Lindsay would have to wait until I was ready to fill her in on my scheme. Even if it meant that I let her believe I was hiding a secret addiction.

Despite the headache my roommate had become, this situation had one advantage. With Lindsay trailing my every move, it was the perfect excuse to put some distance between me and Drew while I sorted through my feelings. He told me to come back when I was ready and I wasn't sure I'd ever be. Anytime I picked up the phone, I couldn't take the next step.

Drew was right about this plan from the start. It was crazy. I thought I knew what I was doing, but now I realized how clueless I'd been. What was I thinking asking Drew for lessons on being sexy? We're talking fun-loving, risk-taking, up-for-anything Drew. Of course things wouldn't go like I'd planned. I figured I wouldn't necessarily be able to control him, but, at the very least, I thought I'd be able to control myself. And I couldn't even do that.

One thing was clear. I was in over my head.

My growling stomach brought my attention back to the present as I meandered through the bustling lunch crowd. Lindsay and I made a beeline for the nearest food line and grabbed anything already in a package. I was hungry, but not enough to take any chances with the cooked stuff. I got in line to pay for the banana and bag of chips I picked up and Lindsay had a protein bar and bottled water.