I have a secret lover.
He takes all my pain away.
I see him each night, with my eyes red from tears.
You can see him on me,
On my arms and legs.
You can hear him in my voice,
Shaking and broken.
But you never notice him.
You aren't looking.
You see he's a secret and meant to be kept that way.
But if you looked only a little bit,
You'd see him there, plain as day.
He doesn't hide, how can he?
He is my one solace,
He keeps me sane.
He keeps me alive.
If you call this living.
You may say he's not real,
But I know.
I know that he's here,
And he'll never leave me.
And all I do to summon him,
Is pick the blade up.
He comes and does the rest.
And I can finally make it through the night.
