Secrets And Scars

1

Maria sat up slowly on the stone bench next to the gazebo. Her hair was mussed, her dress torn and she was in agony for the third time that week. For the past three days, Rolfe had been making excuses to come up to the house just to see Maria. He knew that she'd be out in the garden at the same time each night, because she usually watched Gretl as she practised her singing. That's why Maria was always relieved when Gretl was either too tired, or unwilling to practise. Every evening would be the same. He'd arrive, head round to the back of the house and feign talking to Maria so that Gretl wouldn't get suspicious, and then after Maria had been forced to send her in, he'd start kissing her. It always ended with him forcing her to sleep with him, but tonight was the worst she'd experienced out of all of them. She'd not only had her dignity robbed from her but also her spirit. Georg had been pointing out that she was silent at the dinner table, she was rather ratty with the children, and they'd not been intimate. In all truth, she wanted to slap him for making her feel like she was in the wrong, but she couldn't blame him for Rolfe's actions. There was no one to blame but him...and her...Maria believed that she'd led him on, so she'd started to wear clothing that covered her skin but it hadn't worked. Georg had been trying to comfort her for the past three nights, but she wouldn't say a word to him. She wouldn't say a word to anyone, not even the Reverend Mother when she'd been asked to try and get through to her. All Maria would do is sit there staring at her lap and twisting her hands together. Every evening she would listen to the children singing, knowing that they were trying to get her to join in. Even Georg, bless his heart, sang with them to try and encourage her, but she'd just cry and leave the room after muttering an apology. The only contact she had with Georg now would be when she couldn't breathe as she had panic attacks, and he'd take her to their bedroom and hold her close as she gasped and sobbed softly, before falling asleep from exhaustion.

The moon was high tonight, lighting up the hills near the house which she used to love travelling up to. She'd stopped praying now, choosing instead to block out anything that used to give her joy. Her piano that she'd received for her birthday off of Georg lay gathering dust in the corner of the library, her painting utensils lay hidden in a cupboard, and the only thing she ever used now was the locket that her husband'd given to her to remind her that their bond was inseparable. Each night she'd spin her ring around her finger, wondering why he didn't divorce her. Wasn't it his right to force her wifely duties from her? Wasn't it her place to lay there and let him do what he wanted? Why hadn't he? She wiped away her tears before standing and gasping sharply from pain. She bit her lip as she forced herself to walk inside, and she hoped that no one would see her just in case they put the pieces together. She felt most sorry for little Gretl. They would always have warm milk and biscuits together before bed, Maria reading her the occasional story as she fell into slumber against her chest, before being carried upstairs and laid down between her and her father. There was none of that now. Gretl had cried the first night, and it'd taken over half an hour for her to settle against Georg's embrace as he'd hummed Edelweiss softly into her ear. No one understood what'd gotten into her. She was a shell of her former self, and a completely different woman. She was nothing like the Maria they knew and loved, all full of songs and warmth. She was now cold, and slightly harsh towards them, an invisible storm cloud above her head.

Once she'd gotten inside unseen, she went up to the bedroom. As she'd feared, Georg was awake reading and he'd turned furious, his eye blazing with concern when he saw the state of her. He blocked her way into the bathroom, and she'd looked down at his shoes before her head was lifted by her chin. When he looked into her eyes, she wasn't there. Her eyes were empty, dull and lifeless. The only thing that showed any sign of life within her was the tears brimming.

"What's happened, my love?" He whispered. "You don't have to be afraid to talk to me, that's what I'm here for. You're married, and when you're married your problems are shared out equally between the two people so that it's easier to deal with. I can't help you unless you let me in Maria, and I'll do anything to help you out of this veil of shadows. I want you back, darling. You have no idea how much I want you."

He brought her close to his chest, but she just didn't have the energy to fight against him. She didn't react to his comfort, choosing instead to listen to the steady beating of his heart against her ear. Her eyes drifted closed and she let herself be overtaken by his scent as she began to slowly forget...Her eyes then opened again and she cautiously pulled away from him.

"I need to bathe, Captain," Using his proper name didn't sit well with her now that she wasn't worthy of him any longer. "I shan't be long, so don't keep yourself awake for me." She then walked away from him towards the wardrobe, pulling out the longest nightgown she owned which covered her neck, arms and legs so nothing was on show. She then silently went into the bathroom and locked the door behind her. Georg walked over to the bed and lay on it, groaning in annoyance and also sadness that his wife no longer cared about merely anything. After a few seconds, however, something clicked in his mind and he propped himself up on his hands.
Is it even a possibility? He thought to himself. Why would anyone want to do such a thing to someone who's... who was so sweet and loving towards everyone she meets? The pieces began to fix together in his mind. The torn dress, the blood stains on her calves that he'd noticed, her mussed hair, the fading bruises on her face, it all made sense! Someone was defiling his wife, making her feel like she had no life worth living. He'd find out who the culprit was, and as soon as he did so, someone would pay the price...