Chapter 3: Refusal

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"I'd rather die than live a burden."
-Eren Jaeger

I awoke to the sound of Grandpa Arlert comforting a crying Armin.

"Armin, what's wrong?" I asked my friend. Stupid question. What was right at this given moment?

"Aria, maybe you two could go run around outside. Don't get lost. I'm sure they'll start handing out food soon." Grandpa Arlert instructed. I nodded sleepily, standing up and stretching. I offered a hand out to Armin, pulling him to his feet.

"I'll stay here with Mikasa and Eren, to make sure they're alright." Grandpa gestured towards the two, sleeping peacefully on the ground. Mikasa had a frown on her face, whilst Eren's fists were balled, but otherwise they seemed calm. And that gave me a somewhat sense of security.

Armin and I walked outside, where other refugees and members of the Military and Garrison were bustling about. The sun was just rising, so it had to have only been around six or seven in the morning.

"Why were you awake so early?" I frowned.

"Because I was worried. I couldn't sleep. What if the Titans broke through Wall Rose as well?" Armin sniffled. I froze. That thought hadn't really crossed my mind. After losing everything, I hadn't thought about facing death again".

"Sorry. I shouldn't worry you about these things." Armin said a little more calmly, wiping his tears away.

"It's alright Armin. I can handle it. I'm not a baby." I joked, sticking my tongue out at him.

"I know, I know. It's just, you shouldn't need to be burdened with those sorts of thoughts." Armin laughed nervously.

"We should go check this place out. After all, this could be our home for the next few years." I shrugged, facing the truth. The idea of living as a refugee forever didn't particularly spike my interests.

"Don't say that Aria. Things will get better." Armin said softly, but took my hand and agreed to wander about with me.

When we arrived inside Wall Rose, I don't think we quite anticipated how many other refugees there were. Of course, there was those who survived in Shiganshina, but there was also the large population of those who fled Wall Maria. Armin and I walked past countless buildings, full of other refugees sleeping, other people like us, their lives also destroyed.

"What do you thinks gonna happen?" I whispered to Armin as we walked up a set of stairs we found.

"Happen to what?"

"Us. Them. Everyone. What's going to happen?" I asked. Armin was a knowledgeable person. I entrusted that he'd give me an honest opinion.

"We try to survive." He sighed. "I don't know what's going to happen to us Ari. I doubt anything worse than what's already happened will occur. I mean, what beats this?" He forced a laugh. "But I don't think things will ever return to the way they were."

He was right. No matter what, or how much we wished for it, what had happened could never be erased. The lives that had been taken from us could never be given back. Our lives had been permanently altered. There was no coming back from this.

"Why do we bother fighting?" I asked, looking out at the view below us. The staircase had lead us to a nice little balcony on the side of the building. I climbed up and sat on the railing, my legs dangling off the edge.

"Y-You're not gonna jump, are you?" Armin stuttered, grabbing my arm.

"What? Of course not, you idiot." I whacked him gently around the head. "I'm just admiring the view."

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