Are you ok?

And so just like that Sammy was gone. But not as a joke, not for some time. He was gone and there was no way of getting him back. Dean was hurt his arm was broken his leg stabbed but nothing hurt more than his heart, nothing hurt more than his quilt. After all he was the one who should have been there for Sammy, he was the one who was supposed to save him and protect him but he failed. Dean was in shock he was going over and over the fight trying to find the mistake he made find the reason why Sammy is dead, he was trying to find his quilt in all of that mess that happened, but he couldn't. How time was passing he was forgetting all about his leg covered in wounds and every time he smacked his casted hand into the table he would go back to reality just a bit before his head get all dizzy and lonely. It wasn't like he was alone after all he had Cas, Cas who was sitting next to him all the time. Cas who was fighting next to Sam and Dean through everything including Sams last fight. Cas was also hurting he was also in great grief but he cared more about Deans emotional health than himself. Dean started going to Sams grave everyday and just kept talking for hours while Cas just stend there watching trying to figure out if Dean really thinks that he can hear him and wondering does Dean know it's been almost a year. Dean started arguing whit Cas every day accusing him of Sammys death screaming at him but knowing that neither of them could save him. He was torn and tired of searching for answers. He haven't shaved in months he also lost a few. His body and his brain were exosted so he started sleeping, from 3 hours a night he went to 14 hours a day because he figured that his dreams were better than reality. He had nightmares every time he went to sleep but those nightmares whit monsters and demons were better than his life because he was fighting them whit his baby brother. It's been a little less than two years when Dean decided to take a knife and a gun, sit in his baby and hit a road, although never alone, Cas was always sitting on the back seat of impala even though Dean didn't know. After all he is Deans guardian angel. Every time Dean would kick some basterds ass he would go to a bar and have two beers, but he would never drink the second one because that is the Winchesters tradition. Dean started letting Cas back into his life because he knew Cas was his only family. One day they both got drunk and talked for hours when Dean looked at Cas whit his dazzling green eyes and asked "but why would you stay after all this time for me: a men broken in hell broken in pergotory and broken by heaven and most of all broken on earth?" Cas looked at him touched his hand and said "I will always be there to pick up every last one of your pieces and put them back together no mettere what" . And that's how it went half of Deans soul died that night whit Sammy and half of Castiels was gone too so they had to make it work whit only one whole sole they've been left whit. Deans leg and arm heald and his heart well let's just say his heart is safe.