Love is Free!

I'm so sorry...

Rin POV:

I stare at Haru, waiting for his explanation. I realized that there are still a lot of things I don't know about him. I want to know what he went through while I was in Austrailia. From his fidgeting, I could tell it wasn't exactly a pleasant time for Haru.

"Well, where should I start? Before or after you left for Austrailia?"

"How about from your reaction to me saying that I was gonna leave after we swam the relay together?

"Oh... Well, um... Right after you said that, my eyes flared open. I realized that if you were serious, I might never see you again. I kind of, went home and cried... I never thought we'd have a chance to be like this. Even though that's what I hoped for..." I look down. This is gonna be harder than I thought...

"The day after you left, I guess my mom called Mako's parents because he showed up at my bedroom door. I told him to go away because I didn't want him to see me crying, but he came in anyway and sat at the bottom of the bed. I remember sobbing in a hug, but that's about it."

"That happened a few times, but mostly I just became distant. I didn't really talk to my friends anymore. I'd convinced myself that it was fine. That I was fine. But I wasn't..."

"When you came back for the holidays halfway through that year, I was really happy. You challenged me to race and I couldn't have been happier. I didn't care about winning, but I was happy to swim with you again, so I accepted... When I saw your crying face afterwards, my heart clenched up. I felt bad and tried to help you up, but you just walked past me. I quit swimming after that becaus eI thought I hurt you..." He paused and looked at the floor.

"Haru..."

"I'm okay." He takes a deep breath and continues the story.

"After about 2 years, my parents moved out 'cause of my dad's job, and I got the house to myself. That's when I started taking daily baths and making mackerel every morning. Those two habits have stuck with me." Haru chuckled.

"I went through this 'phase'. I guess you could refer to it as a 'rebelious stage'. It was weird. I was always walking to the skate park just to stare at the people who fell. I wore a lot of dark colors, but ultimately, purple became my color. I wore it almost every day. I'm glad that was just a phase. Although, all of my swimsuits have purple on them..."

I laughed. I could imagine Haru just sitting on a bench, laughing at the falls of strangers while wearing purple everything. The image was just too hilarious!!! Haru looked at me like 'Really, Rin? Really' and I got a hold of myself.

"Sorry. Continue." Haru smiled, but his expression quickly changed and he started talking again.

"Well, in the first year of highschool, I had a really hard time. I was really depressed all the time. It made matters worse that I couldn't swim yet, so I lashed out at people for no reason, and basically gained my reputation as an antisocial, pessimistic, bitch."

"Then you came back. I was happy, but I was scared. What if we had another incident like middle school? What would I do if you left again? I didn't want to keep my distance, but I couldn't bear to look at you. Whenever I did, I'd either start thinking about how sexy you were, or your crying face from before. So I never approached you."

I moved closer to Haru and hugged him. I knew how hard that must have been for him to admit. It's a rather embarrassing subject, and I'm glad he told me.

"I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you or any of the others. I was selfish and stupid as a kid and I left without a second thought. Can you ever forgive me?"

"What the hell are you talking about? I wasn't mad at you, and I've never thought that you abandoned me or anything like that. I understood that you left to persue your dream. I just missed you a lot and I'm glad you're home." He smiles and tugs me in for a kiss. His soft lips were the most reassuring thing in the world to me.

When our kiss broke, I noticed that Haru flinched.

"Does your back hurt?"

"No. It's more my hips."

"Sorry. (chuckle) I'll go get some more meds. Then how about a massage? That might loosen some of your muscles."

"Thank you, Rin." He smiled at me and I planted a kiss on his forehead before getting up.
__________________________
Time skip

About a half hour later, Haru is sitting up on the floor in front of the couch in the living room. He's reading a magazine, while I'm texting Gou. She will not stop asking me for 'relationship details'. I kept trying to tell her that asking your older brother about that kind of thing was weird and that she should stop it, but no. She wouldn't take no for an answer. So I end up telling her how we first kissed. That's all. Thankfully, that made her shut up.

"Rin?"

"Hm?" Haru turned his head towards me and kissed my cheek. I was laying with my feet on the wall and my head by his shoulder, so that wasn't difficult.

I looked at him and smirked, pulling his face towards me. We kiss and kiss for what seems an eternity. I feel better now that I know what Haru went through and why he avoided me when I came back home. I swear not to let him feel like that ever again. And I plan on keeping that promise.