Captured || Book 1

Chapter 7 | Becoming the Mockingjay

Peeta's POV

I visit Prim frequently, knowing she is one of the only people who loved Katniss enough to know what I'm going through. Finnick is always there when I need him and he understands what I'm going through since Annie is in the Capitol too, but I feel more comfortable talking to Prim. She's always there no matter what, unless she's working of course. She got a job as a nurse in the Hospital Wing and is training to be a doctor. I'm so proud of her, and I'm sure Katniss would be too if she were here.

That's what I'm doing today; visiting Prim. I just need someone to talk to right now. I started thinking once again of all the terrible things Katniss could be going through, and I can't be there to help her. It breaks my heart knowing that she is thousands of miles away and I can't hold her to save her from the nightmares or protect her from anyone who tries to touch her.

"Hey, Prim," I smile at her the best I can, hoping she doesn't see the true hurt and sadness behind my eyes. I want to be strong for her. I know if I am strong it will in some way make her stronger, and somehow that means everything right now.

"Hi, Peeta," she smiles at me. "Come on in," she gestures for me to follow and I do so. "Mom left for the hospital an hour ago, so she won't be back for a while. What do you need?"

She knows what I need. She always does. It seems that she knows what I need before I do myself. I always come to talk though, she knows that. But still she asks every time to be polite.

"I just wanna talk," I tell her. She gives me a knowing look and gestures for me to sit on the edge of the bed with her. I do so and she looks at me, as if waiting for me to begin without saying a word. "How are you doing?" I ask her.

"I've been better," she sighs. "It's hard with Katniss not being here."

"I know," I say. "It's like a part is missing in you, right? Like she could slip away at any minute?"

She stares at me, knowing exactly what I'm thinking. "Don't lose hope in her, Peeta. Katniss is still with us, just don't lose that hope."

"It's hard," I say simply, willing myself not to cry. Not here. Be strong for Prim, that's the one thing you have left of Katniss... Prim.

"I know," she says. "It's hard for me too, but you have to think positively. She'll come around, we'll rescue her."

"What can I do?" I ask her. "There must be something I can do to get her out of there,"

"Peeta, I don't think your understanding the importance of being the Mockingjay." She says. "If they need you bad enough then they'll do whatever it takes to get you,"

"What are you saying?" I ask her to clarify.

"If you agree to be the Mockingjay then you could have some conditions," she says. "They just might need you that badly for this war to work,"

"So, your saying I should agree to be the Mockingjay?" I ask and then a button clicks in my head. If I agree to be the Mockingjay then I could make it one of my conditions to rescue Katniss. They need me badly, I know that, so if I could just get them to agree then I may have an even better chance of getting Katniss out of that hell alive. "And then I make them rescue Katniss!"

"Yes," she smiles. "You have to be the Mockingjay,"

I think about it a bit, and Prim can see this so she keeps quiet while I think. I then convert the conversation in a different direction.

"But people are calling her a traitor," I state, remembering back to the day of the interview as words were thrown carelessly around the room. I pause for a second to think of more words to add, but none come to mind, so I ask the question I had been avoiding this whole time, for my sake and Prim's. But I ask it anyways. "Do you think they'll kill her?"

"Peeta, I don't think President Snow will kill her," she says sounding so sure of her words.

"So what do you think they'll do to her?" I ask, regretting this whole conversation because it could end up terribly in the end.

"Whatever it takes to break you,"

Her words ring in my head for days on end. The young girl I once new with two braids, staring into the window of my family bakery has somehow vanished and been replaced by a wise woman. I don't know how she grew up so fast, I just wish she would stay young. But I know in a world like this it is very costly to stay young. No matter what the circumstances. 

I think about agreeing to be their Mockingjay for days. I know my answer already, but I just give myself time to think about what I might say. 

I know I'm running out of time. Katniss could be getting killed at any moment and I can't let that happen. Katniss will see the light of day again, she will live a long and happy life.

So, without thinking ahead of time I march into Command to find Coin and a few others around the oval table. They all stare at me as I enter and then I blurt it out,

"I'll be your Mockingjay,"

.....

I feel like I haven't updated in forever, when in reality it's only been a week.

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Have a great day everybody and may the odds be ever in your favor. :)