No Offense But You're Kinda Fat - l.h -a.u

Mona

That night, assuming the boy I'd barged in on would be present, I skipped dinner, eating one of the granola bars I'd brought from home instead, and then when my stomach growled pathetically an hour later, two more.

I would have been perfectly content living off my supply until it was gone, then wasting away never having to face him, however the following day classes started, meaning leaving my room was inevitable and so, begrudgingly and itching in the overpriced frumpy sweater my Mom had insisted I looked, "Absolutely phenomenal in," I trudged down the stairs, my face burning in humiliation at the sight of a broad back and mop of messy blonde hair waiting for me.

I contemplated turning and going back upstairs, then tripped noisily, destroying my plans when the boy whirled around, looking momentarily startled before a smirk tugged at the corner of his lip.

"Morning," he greeted, his voice husky from lack of use.

"Good morning-hi." I choked out awkwardly.

Cocking an eyebrow, he raised a Darth Vader mug up to his mouth and took a long sip before looking me up and down.

"Mona?"

"Ramona."

"Luke."

Fiddling with my fingertips I watched as he leaned against the countertop. Dressed in low hanging sweatpants and socks, nothing else, he looked like a Calvin Klein add had thrown him up pulling him from its pages and placing him in real life.

His face was elf-like, but in a good way, words like hot and attractive didn't do him justice, he was beautiful and unique and ethereal, like some kind of woodland creature that didn't really belong in the ugly world of humans.

He was tall and broad, yet slender, like a tree. He was muscular, but lean, chiseled, perfect and I found myself wishing he'd put a shirt on.

"Enjoy what you see?" he questioned, seemingly reading my mind.

"No." I breathed, then felt horrible, "I mean, you're Very-I'm just not looking but you're very nice looking."

"Cat got your tongue?"

"I'm sorry about yesterday." I blurted out.

Tilting his head to the side, he frowned as if thinking, "For what?"

"Walking in on you." I said slowly.

"Not a big deal babe."

Babe.

The room suddenly felt like an oven, and the neck of my sweater like a noose.

"But you were naked." I croaked, digging myself a hole.

He shrugged.

"Sorry." I whispered.

"Not sure why you're blushing Mona, you're not the first girl to see me naked."

Wishing the tile floor would open up and swallow me hole I watched wide eyed and horrified as he winked at me, drained his mug, filled it with water and set it in the sink before starting out of the room.

"I don't find you attractive." I blurted out unconvincingly.

Seeming surprised and visibly trying to hide his smirk, Luke stopped in the doorway, "Oh?"

"No offense," I said shakily, "But your pompous frat boy douche nugget attitude is ugly."

"Pompous frat boy douche nugget?" he laughed, a loud booming sound which seemed to shake the foundation of the house.

Praying my eyes didn't betray me and leak I looked down at the floor and nodded.

"Okay babe," he chuckled, seeming amused, "Well, no offense but you're kinda fat."

I didn't know what he said after that, or if he said anything, I don't think I would have noticed if the ceiling fell in and crushed me, in all honesty I wanted it too. My vision blurred by tears, regretting having tried to stand up to Luke at all, I stood in the middle of the kitchen crying like an idiot for what felt like too long before running up to my room, feeling fat and gross and wrong.

Ripping my sweater over my head I flopped down on my futon, feeling self-conscious and wanting to go home.