the adventures of jish and the kipling

the adventures of jish and kipling (unfinished)

"Josh, get up! What are you doing? Wake up!" Josh felt debby's claws sink into his skin.

"Josh im late for work! Do you understand how important this job is to me?" Josh laid on his side not caring about a single word that came out of debby's mouth. the yelling continued for a few minutes and josh was finally so annoyed that he spat out:

"If you care so much about your job then why don't you go have sex with that guy who plays ravi every night instead of me? Why dont you go have a fucking threesome with ravi and that lizard for all i care." Debby was lost for words. Seconds passed and debby and josh did not break eye contact. Debby shook her head and grabbed josh's forearm using just her red fingernails.

"Debby what the fuck." said josh, who was shirtless and had boxers with tyler joseph's face on them.

"Put on a shirt, Josh. You're coming to the set." Oh no, Josh thought. Josh did not want to see any of those disney bitches let alone a disney lizard. But Josh did not want debby to make his forearm bleed again, so he put on a shirt.

Josh slept the whole five minute car ride to the set. He was awakened by Debby once again with a slap on his chest this time.

"Wake the fuck up, Josh, Im not gonna say it again." Tyler wouldn't treat me this way, josh thought peacefully. Tyler didn't claw Josh until he bled. As soon as Josh got out of the car he knew something wasn't right. The parking lot was empty and the lights were turned off in the building they would soon enter.

But Josh was so out of it that he chose to ignore the suspicious signs. Debby slowly opened the door to the dark building that half-asleep josh would walk into. As he was two feet away from the door, he felt a strong push on his back. Josh stumbled into the dark room and Debby slammed the door shut. Josh could hear whispering and arguing coming from outside the door. When it stopped, it was dead silent, and the lights flickered on. The room was almost entirely white; with white walls, floors, and a white bed in the corner. there was a vase of red roses and a few candles, and laying on top of the bed, was the lizard whom josh despised.

"Where am i?" Josh said not very loud fearing the mutant lizard animal would charge at him.

"Josh." There was a speakerphone right above Joshs head. Josh could immediately recognize the voice. It was ravi.

"Josh, listen to what I am about to tell you." Josh was 100% sure that he had been drugged by ravi. What did this Indian bitch want from him?

"As cast members of the show, Jessie,'' said ravi who was faking his accent "have agreed to make a deal. Every single person who has walked the set of Jessie has been a part of this deal. so now you must agree to this deal as well, and fuck the lizard" josh assumed that all of this was drugs and it was all in his head, so he just started to walk in small circles around the room.

"What are you doing Josh." Josh started to hysterically laugh. As josh approached the bed he grabbed a candle and started to light the lizard on fire. josh could have sworn he heard screaming from the jessie cast, but he said to himself it was the drugs kicking in.

"4:20 BLAZE IT" josh screamed at he charged at the wall head first.

Josh could now hear the jessie cast members screaming as well as crying, now. At this point, the lizard had burnt to a crisp and josh was laying on the floor. it went silent in the room again and then dark. The song all star started to play very loudly but josh was still laying on the floor. Before josh knew it, the whole shrek soundtrack had played, and he continued to lay on the floor.

Josh grew extremely bored so he read the milk fan fiction from start to finish and enjoyed it very much. Also, Josh was very turned on. He thought of Tyler and their plan to murder debby.It was a nice plan. Josh was so caught up in thinning about tyler he almost didn't notice the lights flicker on.

"ITS OVER JOSH" the speakerphone blasted.

"what the fuck ravi" josh said.

suddenly hundreds of naked mole rats emerged from the air vents.

"4:20 BLAAAAAAAAZE IT" said a voice from above. josh peered up at the white ceiling. he recognized the wings and the black and white stripes almost immediately. brendon urie flew through the air as josh watched in awe.

beebo struck all of the naked molerats at once using just his forehead, as this is gospel played in the background.

"beebo!!' josh yelled. but beebo could not hear josh, he was still soaring at the top of the ceiling. after yelling beebos name several times, josh became very annoyed and threw a dead mole rat at beebo. beebo came plummeting down, yelling satanic chants and josh caught him by his wings.

"WHAT THE FRICK FRACK SNICK SNACK PADDY WACK WAS THAT JOSH" beebo said as he started to cry.

josh didn't know what beebo said because he was just too drugged at this point. so he started to sing taco bell saga. as josh reached the end of the song, the door to the room swung open.

there was no one outside because the purge had just started. josh laughed at the sight of beebos forehead glistening in the moonlight. josh started running around the empty parking lot, with several knives and other weapons being flung at him.

''JOSH NO!" beebo yelled at josh as he reaized this was the first time josh had been more drugged than him. 

"AHEHEHHUHUAHHAGAHAG'' said josh as he continued to dodge weapons being flung at him.

then, josh saw someone from the top of the building of the set of jessie. 

''DEBBY.'' josh started to crawl up the building using his suction cup gloves tyler had given him for his birthday (debby had not given josh anything).

so this is all i have so far1!!11 i hope no one was offended by mr. kipling being burnt to a crisp.