At about the age 11 is when my mom got sick.It's when she got mean and sang started to get more attention the attention i craved.the way i see it is in my mothers eyes is that she wants to protect sang from something.So ever since sang got more attention from our mom, is when i started getting jealous of sang. Sure sang got punished, but at least mom noticed her. the only only time i'm noticed by my own mother is when i ask for money.
so around age 13, is when i started acting out and seeing if she noticed me. I would break a plate, trek mud into the house, or i would turn my music up load enough to shake the house. But all of my attempts failed because mother would think it was sang. sang would get punished and i wouldn't even know it if i couldn't hear it or see it sometimes.
At age 14 is when i started glaring at sang and being mean to her because she's ruined all my attempts to be seen, to be noticed in my own house. Dad doesn't care about either of us. he acknowledges me less then mother does and he doesn't try to help sang when she's being punished.
There's one question i've only been asked once in my whole life. It's a question i wished would be asked now or maybe a year or two ago. The question was "are you okay?". the question wasn't asked by my parents or sang. It was asked by a complete stranger.
........flash back...... marie at age 6..........
It's a cloud free day, the sun is shining, and the wind is blowing. We're going to the park today and i'm so happy. i'm all ready in my favorite sun dress and sang is in a blue dress. she's only 4. "come on marie its time to go to the park you silly girl." mother says from the door. i squeal and run to the car in excitement. i hope in my car seat and buckle my self in like a big girl. i look to sang's seat and see mommy already strapped her in and is at the wheel. mommy pulls out the drive way and in seconds we're at the park. i quickly unbuckle my seatbelt and wait for mommy to open my door.
Mommy finally opened my door with sang at her side. She unbuckled me and I climbed downed out of the car. "Ok you two as long as I can see you your free to roam. I'll be right over there if you need me. Now go play." She said kissing our heads after pointing to the bench she would be sitting at. Me and sang both took off full blast to the the play ground.
There were some children here. Some were on the swing, monkey bars, and some just playing with sand. I took off toward the monkey bars to test my skills. There were 3 other kids on the monkey bars. I finally reached the bars and waited to get my turn to swing across.
It's was finally my turn and with so much happiness in I grab the first bars and swing to the second. Then to the third which is kind of harder to do. Hmm I guess it's been a while since I've come here. I try to go to the fourth but my hands are a little slippery and I miss it. I'm falling before I know it. "Owww"
Nobody seems to have heard me
Or not care because nobody's helping me. But then a shadow is castes over me. The shadow asks "are you ok?" I look up and it's a boy... with blonde hair and eyes that sparkle with a happiness to them.
" I don't know. My foot hurts" I replied.
"Well let me help you my name is..."
