Jaime Lannister - Game of Thrones Imagines & Drabbles

Request - Jaime Lannister "Ruination"

"Get away from me!" You wrapped your arms around your knees, wanting to shut out the rest of the world. Ravens had slowly started to bring in the news of what had happened at the Twins and you had gotten sicker with every new message they had brought. Joffrey was of course making sure that everyone knew what had happened there, but luckily he never said where Tywin and Walder had gotten so much of their information. You knew. You only knew too well what had happened before the Wedding.

"I'm not planning on leaving you in this state, Y/N." Jaime had only returned to court a few days ago, maimed, hardly the same man as he had been before he left, but somehow he had sought out your company over those days. "Not when you're clearly not feeling well."

You shrugged, leaning against the wall next to the window you were sitting in.
"How can anyone feel well with what had happened? Unless..." You cut off what you wanted to say, realizing that Joffrey was his cousin, that Cersei was his sister and if rumours were true, they were a bit more than that. He would be on their side. You couldn't tell him how twisted they were to enjoy the deaths of so many men and women.
"I just wish it never happened."

"You are from the North, are you not?" You heard how he pulled a chair closer to where you were sitting. Clearly he wasn't planning on listening to you and leaving you alone anytime soon.
"I think I remember you when you came here. Close with both the Stark sisters, weren't you? I think I remember seeing you with them. Shouldn't you be at Sansa's side, trying to comfort her in this time of sorrow?"

You shook your head, looking at him for the first time. You hadn't wanted him to see your tear streaked face... he was one of them, even when he didn't act like them at the moment.
"She deserves better than someone like me."

Jaime raised an eyebrow.
"You were her friend, weren't you? You look wrecked after what happened in the Riverlands. She must feel devastated. Why don't you share your sorrows? Surely it must make it more bearable."

He had no idea. He didn't know how far you had strayed from the people you should be loyal to. How sorry you were for ever doing that. How you could never make up for what had happened.
"I am not ruined. I am ruination." They were dead because of you. Because you had talked too much with Lannister lackeys. Because they had used you to get the last pieces of information they needed.

Jaime just shook his head at your confession of why you couldn't go to her, stood up and sat down in the window, facing you.
"I have no idea what you think you have done, Y/N, but trust me. Whatever has happened is not your fault. It was higher politics and you surely had no part in that."

You couldn't help but look at his stump. The glorious knight Jaime Lannister had left and this man had returned. But that wasn't important right now. He was wrong.
"I talked too much. I wanted to make friends here but all that happened was that they used me to destroy everything."

He nodded, a faint smile around his lips.
"And you think that whatever you have said caused the slaughter at the twins?"

You nodded, afraid your voice wouldn't hold when you talked.

He took your hand in his, trying to relax you a bit.
"Let me tell you something, love. Robb Stark signed his own death sentence when he married that foreign girl and broke the deal with Walder Frey. My father and the King saw an opportunity to get rid of an enemy. Do you truly believe they wouldn't have been able to do this without the help of a Northern girl? They would have gotten what they wanted, no matter what. Now they managed to do that the friendly way, but do you truly believe that they wouldn't have gotten you to talk if you would have been more closed off? It would just have been far less pleasurable."

It was the first thing someone had said to you since that first disastrous message the raven had brought that didn't push you further into you misery.
"You don't think I brought this upon them?"

Jaime shook his head.
"You didn't wield a knife, Y/N. You may have been a tad careless, but that happens to all of us..." He glanced quickly at his stump.
"But you did not kill them. You are not responsible for this." He stood up, offering you his good hand to escort you down as well.
"I will bring you to Sansa. You will need each other."