Endearment

Chapter 1

Out from the balcony, Lorean Jeffrey stood close to the edge as she took a deep breath of the Aruban air and hummed to herself a lullaby that her mother once sang to her as a child. Her eyes were as big as the galaxy and as black as the night sky. When she finished off the sweet melody her eyes began to tear up, they sparkled in the sunlight. She shed a tear but quickly wiped it away as she turned around and entered into her room locking the balcony door behind her.

Lorean's mother had just passed away a few days ago due to stomach cancer. The disease had been growing slowly over the last 3 years going strong until this past month of November. The pain became too unbearable for her to handle .To end the suffering she decided to go through assisted suicide. She died with dignity but a part of her daughter died with her . Lorean would have loved for Nico to be there with her for a moment like this, but he lived in Canada and she lived in Aruba. They have been together for the past 9 months. Both have helped each other to pursue their goals in life. He also helped her to get over the death of her mother. It got hard some days when they missed each other. They couldn't necessarily be with or hold one another.

Lorean enjoyed writing poems for him when she felt sad. Her last poem was about her feelings of the relationship. It read: "At first things were perfect then my insecurities took over , it was a beautiful start we talked for hours about how much we loved each other and a future of both of us together. To this present day, I feel so good talking to you and it's too much to let go. I find it so hard to let you know how I deeply feel inside and it kills me to lie, lie about the real pain I have when you are gone, jealous of those who get to see you night to dawn. Why? why must we have to be so far apart? why? why must my heart break every time, I plant so many assumptions in my head ill rather hide them then share them with you instead". Lorean had not yet sent it to Nico but she was planning to after she was done mourning over her mother.

She often talked about the struggles of the distance between them but, Nico always replied saying " it doesn't matter where I am Lorean. I'll always be yours". She was always low on hope in life and gave up on a lot of things. She was not a person to finish what she started. She dealt with depression from her hard childhood but often kept it to herself. When she met Nico online he helped her get through it and build up some of her confidence and happiness, with the help of time and prayer. He told her that "when times get hard, you are never alone. Take things slow, you don't have to go through hard times own your own". She repeated those words in her head when times got tough, it seemed to help. It was easy to stress on things but she realized that she was really blessed to have what she had when she understood that some people had less.