Sabrina struggled with the zipper on her tight floor length dress. Sanding in front of a tall mirror, she twisted her long fingers around the metal clasp, trying not to rip the black silk. Alex sat in the opposite corner of the room, a lopsided smile of amusement on her face as she watched Sabrina struggle. It would look rude to most people, a girl not helping her sister, but Alex knew Sabrina would never ask for help, and deny it when offered. Sabrina was not exactly independent or strong, but she liked to be treated with as much respect as someone who was. She was not a foolish girl.
She exhaled loudly and tucked a strand of her short auburn hair behind her ear from where it had fallen out of a bobby pin. Sabrina gave one last stubborn pull on the zipper, giving up on being gentle on the thin silk. The force sent a jolt through the small girl's body, making her let out a small gasp. She had known the dress would look ghastly on her when it had arrived in the mail, but when she looked in the mirror she was horrified.
Her pale skin stood out against the dark material. The long cylindrical shape of the dress looked old fashioned, like what you would see a grandmother in during the holidays. Sabrina took a long look in the mirror, leaning over so her nose touched the cold surface of the glass.
She had deep purple moons under her eyes the color of over ripened grapes. Her cheeks were unhealthily hollow, and the pink tone they used to have had fled day by day until there was nothing left of it. In the mirror Sabrina shifted her eyes to Alex, who was playing with a long thin bracelet she had twisted from her wrist to her elbow. Her tan exotic skin sparkled under the dim light, and her black hair framed her face, the strands landing among her shoulders. Her eyes were the color of firefly bottoms. She had thin wrinkles around her eyes from always smiling, which Sabrina thought only added to her beauty. But her face had changed for the funeral. She was a rose in a concrete garden, beautiful, but forlorn. With a last sigh, Sabrina turned around,"Ready?"
The breeze was chill but the sun shone brightly, making the cement on the front steps gleam with flecks of crystal. A line of cars were parked in the extensive driveway, accompanied by a handful of adults, crisply dressed in black.Her mother was there, her hair pulled back exposing her angular face. The people were clustered together, talking softly.
Probably about the funeral, but Sabrina couldn't remember anymore.
Her small heeled shoes clicked as she walked down the steps. She looked over at Adriana, who smiled at her.
"It's nice out today, isn't it Alex?" She looked up at the sun and let the wind tousle her hair. Everyone eyes passed over Alex in a ghostly matter, not focusing on anything in particular.
A tall man locked eyes Sabrina uneasily. Her mother was the second person to spot her, and she eyed the spot where Alex was holding Sabrina's hand. She walked unsteadily towards Sabrina, her face was unreadable mask. With a swift movement she pulled Sabrina towards the back garden, her hands cold against the girl's exposed skin.
"Sabrina! Your embarrassing us in front of our family!"
Her mother had long legs, causing Sabrina to nearly trip over her skirt as she dragged her along. "Come with us Alex!" Sabrina screamed back to the crowd of people where her sister was standing. The muscles in her mother's face tensed as Sabrina said her older sister's name. It wasn't like the look her mother would give her when she was exacerbated, a look that would send all children running to kingdom come. This was different.
The expression reminded Sabrina of the time she had broken the small locket her mother usually kept around her neck. The sadness was so deep-set, but with an undercut of shame. There was nothing left of the joy they used to have.
It hurt to meet eyes with her.
Her mother set her down on the back bench surrounded by marigolds. And left her with silence. Her arm was cold were her mother's hand had been.
Sabrina wanted to say something, but she thought better of it and shut her mouth with a snap. Somehow as she was looking at the flowers, they twisted something in her. Like an old clock winding backwards.
She watched Alex, her skin taking on the tint of the marigold. Her beautiful hair coming undone and turning to dust in the wind. Her legs no longer having the strength to hold her up. Her smile sinking into her face until there was nothing left. And all she could do was sit there, and watching her wisp away. She realized what she must have looked like. Foolish. A foolish girl.
She wanted to cry then, but she must have spent so much time pushing back the tears that they refused to come.
It was the beginning of spring, and things had just started to bloom. In the corner of the garden was a bed of marigolds, where Sabrina's chunky British shorthair named Mage was napping.
He woke suddenly with a chill, and looked cross eyed as a small purple butterfly landed on his nose softly. It was shady in the garden, and Mage had found the single patch of sunlight that had not been blocked off by the trees.
The butterfly stood its ground motionless. As one of Mage's thick white paws came down on its wing. It didn't flutter. It spread its wings wider so the sun reflected off the brilliant colors. Sabrina thought she had ever seen a creature so brave, as she sat and witnessed butterfly's death.
And in that moment she hated that butterfly, because when Mage was done with it, there was nothing left.
